Note to readers • This is part of a collaborative project between The Salt Lake Tribune and the NS Times, North Sanpete High School’s student newspaper. Read more about these young Utahns’ experiences and perspectives here.

I sat across the desk from a young girl in crisis. Through tears she told me that she wanted to graduate early, that she had no friends and that she hated the school.

This wasn’t unprecedented, but what made this experience so unusual was that she was the sixth one in a matter of a few weeks.

The other unusual part was that she and those before her were not the students who typically hate school. They were all talented, intelligent and popular.

I was perplexed.

The year was 2014, and, as a counselor of just a couple of years, I had no idea what was going on.

I know now. More than a decade after those initial encounters, I have had similar conversations dozens of times.

In 2017 I read an article by Jean M. Twenge in “The Atlantic” called “Have Smartphones Destroyed a Generation?” that convinced me that smartphones were the single biggest negative influence on the collective lives of teens, and the problem has gotten worse.

In my classes, I work with some of the best students in the world. They are thoughtful, kind, intelligent and motivated to succeed. And nearly every one of them has had struggles with emotional issues, many of which have been exacerbated by their smartphones.

From the time I read that article, I have challenged my journalism and English 1010 class to go without their phones for one week.

The first few years, nearly all the class joined in. Lately, I’m lucky if I get close to half. They just can’t do it.

Invariably the comments of those who do put their phones away for a week have similar reactions. They realize the extent of their addictive behaviors. Most go through withdrawals the first few days, reaching for a non-existent device over and over again. One of my journalism students wrote about her experience for The Salt Lake Tribune.

Freeing up two to five hours every day is no small thing. They realize how much time they have and how different everything feels. They can do their homework, they have time to be with their friends and family, and they almost always say they feel better — that they’re happier.

They also tend to get bored, and they notice how addicted their friends are.

The problems created for teens by smartphones are serious and near-universal.

We have led teens into a new technological world, a digital jungle full of pitfalls and dangers that we do not even fully understand.

As a school counselor, I have seen firsthand how ubiquitous this problem is for the rising generation. Few students who have social media and unfettered access to any app have not experienced serious problems.

As we discussed as a staff the most important issues that face them as students, it was clear that technology was the primary concern. Their childhood has been altered from ours in ways that we do not fully understand or appreciate.

It’s true that technology has influenced the lives of every generation, but we are not just talking about the invention of radio, TV or even the internet here.

At no point in human history has a new technology reached so many so fast. And at no point in human history has there been a tool that so profoundly alters our most basic human emotional needs, including our need to communicate and connect with each other.

No one was prepared for how pronounced and profound this change would be. The vast majority of parents are still not prepared to help their students safely navigate this cyberscape.

Here I have to interject that I love technology. My phone has empowered me in a myriad of ways to do things that were previously impossible, and it has made life more convenient.

Smartphones clearly have incredible, even life-saving capabilities, but they come with serious, and yes, sometimes fatal flaws.

My plea to parents is to take control of your students’ digital lives.

So many parents are so concerned about their children’s physical safety in the real world, and they should be, but their vigilance and worry needs to extend to the digital world, as well, where even more dangers lurk, often undetected.

I recommend reading the book, “The Anxious Generation” by Jonathan Haidt to get an idea of how to help your teens.

I believe there is no single thing you can do to better help your child than to take control of their digital lives.

Ben Cox is a teacher and counselor at North Sanpete High School. He loves his family, tennis, singing, teaching, and thrives in chaos.

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