Having previously disparaged Blacks, Mexicans and Asian Americans, Mary Cosby takes aim at Latter-day Saints in the latest episode of “The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City;” at one former member of that church in particular.
Muttering to herself after a fight with the other women, Mary is caught on mic saying, “Heather with her little judgmental self. She has the snobbiness of a true Mormon. She don’t even know she look inbred.”
The episode aired just days after Mary embarrassed herself online. After Page Six reported that Mary has indeed been dropped from the show after failing to show up for the upcoming Season 2 reunion episodes, she took to Twitter to declare, “This Story Is Not True!! This is a complete Fabrication’ A Complete Lie!’ I have not spoke to anyone!!”
Within hours, multiple media outlets — including the Hollywood Reporter, “Entertainment Tonight,” Entertainment Weekly and People magazine — reported that Mary’s exit was confirmed. And Page Six then reported that, according to a source inside the production, Mary “became the laughingstock of Salt Lake City” by denying she was no longer a part of the show.
Well, Mary at least made it clear that she didn’t quit.
In the second-to-last episode of Season 2, one Housewife gets a glimpse inside Mary’s world and a better understanding of why she is who she is. And the Housewives are still screaming at each other over a simple misunderstanding, drowning out any chance of what could be a rather easy resolution.
Late in the Feb. 6 episode, the Faith Temple Pentecostal Church has its first in-person service in “about a year,” and Mary — the church’s “first lady” is excited. “Everyone’s on the same page and everyone has the same love for you,” she says. Mary quickly ramps up, yelling into a gold microphone as she exhorts her parishioners.
At Mary’s invitation, Jen Shah is there. “I want to see for myself” what Mary is all about, Jen says. What she sees is the adoration heaped on Mary by church members. One says, “You are my perfect love. God’s love for his people reigns in you. God shines on all that you do. You are the perfect friend. You are a master of positivity.”
Jen looks startled.
The church member goes on to say that Mary is “the facsimile of God” with “beauty that’s beyond divine.” Another member gets down on one knee in front of Mary. Another member shrieks that Mary is the “best friend I could ever imagine.” We see only snippets of the service, but what we see is the members praising Mary, not God.
In a confessional, Jen says, “I didn’t know this side of Mary. ... Mary is used to being treated by her congregation, like, whatever she says, that’s what it is. And you don’t question it. She’s a rock star. She can do no wrong with her gold microphone.”
It explains why Mary reacts so differently to the other Housewives, who — with the possible exception of Meredith Marks — have never treated her like she’s a rock star.
Misunderstanding turns into a war
It’s all sort of stupid, but here’s the quick rundown on how a misunderstanding morphed into high drama:
• Several of the Housewives question whether Meredith had anything to do with Jen being arrested on federal fraud and money-laundering charges. Meredith has a vendetta against Jen, so that seems plausible to Whitney Rose, Heather Gay, Jennie Nguyen, Lisa Barlow and Jen.
• Meredith was not on the shuttle bus that took the women to Vail on the day that Jen was arrested, which is seen as evidence that Meredith knew the cops were coming. Meredith was already in Colorado for a memorial for her late father. “Truth be told, I’d want to be there to watch the arrest,” Meredith says. “Are you crazy? You think I would’ve missed it if I was the cause of it?”
• The women believe Meredith gave conflicting dates for that memorial in Aspen. They question if there was a memorial at all, or if it was a ruse to explain why she wasn’t on the bus.
• Heather says Meredith told her the memorial was the day before Jen’s arrest. Lisa believes that when she called Meredith on the day of Jen’s arrest, she was interrupting the memorial. Watching Lisa’s end of the conversation, it’s clear that (a) Lisa was very upset about Jen’s arrest, and (b) she appears to sincerely believe she’s called Meredith during the memorial.
None of this should amount to anything. But it results in open warfare.
Lisa is the richest
The Feb. 6 episode picks up where the previous episode left off. Lisa is caught on a hot mic calling Meredith a “whore” and saying she slept with “half of New York.”
Lisa yells at Jennie that none of the other Housewives had her back when she was fighting with Mary, which isn’t true. And she says that Meredith “owes me the biggest apology of everyone because I almost got my ass kicked because of her.” (A reference to the fight on the shuttle bus when Jen and Lisa both had to be restrained.)
“You guys all have a problem with Mary’s church,” Lisa yells. “You all have a problem with everything, but nobody [expletive] talks about it. I brought it all up. I took it for all of you, and you all just sat there.” Lisa describes her fight with Mary as “the pot making up lies about the kettle.”
Heather and Jen come into Lisa’s room and join the argument. Lisa runs into the bathroom, and she’s followed by Jen, Heather, Jennie — and a burly crew member, who’s apparently there to make sure the fight doesn’t get physical. (Given recent events, it’s a reasonable precaution.)
Lisa remains livid. “Guess what?” she yells. “I am [expletive] richer than all of you! I don’t need to be here. Get me the [expletive] out of here!”
In a confessional, Jen says, “Everyone’s screaming. Lisa’s having a meltdown. I can tell it’s going to be a long night. I need to get my popcorn because this is going to be good.” In another part of the house, Mary is grumbling about Heather and Mormons, who prefer to be known as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
“I have put up with so much for the last two years,” Lisa says in a confessional. “I would expect this from everybody else. But now, Meredith? Wow!” Jen sides with Lisa. “I would be hurt too if my best friend of 10 years was a piece of [expletive] friend to me.”
Jen, Heather, Whitney and Jen all agree that the bond between Mary and Meredith is weird. And Jen once again implies she knows more about Meredith than she’s saying: “I could crucify people.”
Heather floats the theory that Lisa’s friendship with Jen “was keeping [Meredith] safe in a lot of ways.” In a confessional, Heather says, “I know that Jen has a lot of dirt on Meredith that she wants to spew, but she doesn’t” because she fears that “could jeopardize her friendship with Lisa.”
A low blow
Whitney heads to the kitchen to try to apologize to Meredith. “I did not mean disrespect,” she says.
“Oh, you were very disrespectful with me,” Meredith replies. She tells Whitney she thinks she is “lying and making it up” about her estrangement from her father, who is battling drug addiction. “Why don’t I take something painful to you and just rip the scab and tell you no one believes you,” Meredith says.
The look on her face is downright ugly and mean. She yells at Whitney: “You’re father’s alive. Mine is dead. Keep asking about it! Is it really your business? No!” Meredith then rants at Whitney that she should have come to her for clarification — which is exactly what Whitney has been trying to do.
“Did you want me to hire a private investigator to find out?” Whitney says. Which is smart and funny, given that Meredith hired a private investigator to check out all the other Housewives. Meredith gives Whitney a death stare. “My father died! What doesn’t [expletive] add up about that?”
BTW, nobody has been speculating about her father’s death. They are speculating about whether Meredith told the truth about a memorial for him. “This isn’t about your father passing away,” Whitney says. Meredith interrupts her, saying, “Oh, it’s all about my father.”
As Whitney walks away, Mary smirks at her. Then, with a grin on her face, she tells Meredith, “Some people’s brain is not developed.” In a confessional, Mary says Whitney is “completely out of her mind” and “mean.”
Meredith marches upstairs to confront the other women. Soon, she’s screaming and pointing her finger at Lisa, “Did you speculate on my father’s death?” When Lisa denies it, Meredith yells, “Don’t lie!” Lisa shouts back, “You’re the [expletive] liar!”
Meredith, who has just been yelling at Lisa, says, “Lisa, stop yelling at me.”
Meredith’s actions bring her under more suspicion. In a confessional, Heather says, “I thought all of this was just a miscommunication, but the way she’s reacting makes it seem like she’s lying about even having a memorial.” Later, she says, “I feel like Meredith didn’t say the date because she doesn’t want to be caught in a lie.”
Where is Mary?
Meredith storms off, and Heather says, “Where’s Mary Cosby for Meredith right now?” Whitney storms out herself in search of Mary, followed by Jen.
Whitney finds Mary and tells her that Meredith needs her, Mary makes faces at her and says, “I’m done with you. I’m done with your cousin (Heather). … I want you to get out of my face.”
In a confessional, Mary says, “It’s exhausting to argue with someone that’s drunk.” She’s not always wrong.
Lisa asks Mary why she even came on the trip “if you don’t care about any of us.” Mary replies, “Because this was my last attempt, and I’m done. ... I don’t care about your hurt.”
Meredith explains that she’s Mary’s friend because she has “been good to me. She’s been kind to me.” What’s unsaid is that, in Meredith’s view, Mary can be as mean and cruel as she wants as long as she’s nice to Meredith.
In a confessional, Lisa says, “It’s unbelievable that Mary can say and do whatever she wants to anyone, and Meredith will have her back relentlessly. ... This is [expletive]. I’m done.”
The following morning, everybody just wants to go home. “I woke up with the biggest hangover,” Whitney says in a confessional. “I’m exhausted. I’m emotional. I just want to press the eject button and get the hell out of here.”
Lisa is still hurt. “I feel really sad right now because I know Meredith knows that I’m a good friend to her,” she says. “Meredith knows that I love her. Meredith knows that I love her family. ... My friendship really doesn’t matter to her. It’s devastating.”
Mary tries to convince Meredith not to get on the Mercedes Sprinter van with the other women for the ride back to Salt Lake City. “I think you look too pretty to get on that Sprinter,” she says.
But Meredith is determined to get on that van. “It feels like whenever I’m not around, these women have nothing better to do than gossip about me,” she says in a confessional. “Which, I have to say, is pretty sad. Get a life. So there is no chance I’m not riding in that Sprinter van.” (Apparently, nothing happened on the ride.)
Displaying the same lack of courage she demonstrated by skipping the Season 2 reunion episodes, Mary declares she won’t ride on the shuttle bus and takes an SUV back home. “I am so done with these women,” Mary says in a confessional. “I cannot get out of here fast enough. … I cannot take this anymore.”
Heather tells Lisa the Housewives “have not held Mary to the fire. We have looked the other way. And we have excused her behavior. We have excused her church. We have given her the benefit of the doubt, even though she’s openly, aggressively cruel.”
“She is,” Lisa agrees. “Mary is very cruel.”
And, Heather says, Mary “might possibly be the least honest, which is saying a lot for this group.”
Lisa says that “the last thing” she thought was that she’d “be leaving” southern Utah “at odds with Mary and Meredith and bonding with Whitney and Heather. ... But there is a shift in dynamics in this friend group, and I think it’s stemming from the fact that Mary and Meredith have the most bizarre bond that I don’t think any of us understand.”
Meredith and Whitney and Heather?
Back home, Meredith invites Whitney and Heather over to her house for a workout. She is not, however, in a conciliatory mood. “If anything, I think I am owed an apology for everyone gossiping about me and belittling my father’s death,” she says.
Again, nobody has belittled her father’s death. They belittled Meredith.
On the way to Meredith’s house, Whitney tells Heather about what Meredith said about her estrangement from her father. “She low-blowed me,” Whitney tells Heather, “and she knows it.”
Heather is not pleased. “If I had heard that, I would’ve raged,” she says. And she wonders why Meredith invited her and Whitney to her home. “I know what she’s doing,” Whitney says. “This is her trying to kiss our a-- ‘cause she knows she was wrong. … This is a cover-up.”
Meredith has a trainer at her house who’s going to hook Whitney and Heather up to an electro-stimulation apparatus. And she cackles with glee as she tells the trainer to turn up the electricity and give them “a little torture. I had a rough trip last week. This could be a little payback.” She’s kidding, but she seems delighted with the notion.
Meredith is all hugs and kisses when the other two women arrive, and Whitney is startled. “This is not the Meredith we left in Zion,” she says.
Meredith apologizes to Whitney for what she said on the trip, and Whitney tries one more time to tell Meredith she just wants to confirm the date of her father’s memorial. Meredith says the memorial was on the day before Jen’s arrest. And Heather — who pushed the conflicting-dates theory — throws Lisa under the bus. “I’m curious why Lisa would do all of this and start all of this drama about one of her supposed best friends.”
Meredith sees Lisa’s mistake as a plot against her. It doesn’t occur to any of them that Lisa could’ve just been mistaken. In a confessional, Meredith says, “It feels like Lisa is just, like, adding fuel to the fire between me and Jen. Before you start spreading rumors that I faked a memorial because I turned Jen into the FBI, perhaps you should ask me. I don’t get where this is going. Are you my friend or not?”
Again, Heather and Whitney fostered that speculation. And, hypocritically, Meredith takes their word without asking Lisa what happened. “If everything you guys are telling me is true,” Meredith says, “then I’m done.” With Lisa, that is.
We don’t see Meredith say anything positive about Lisa in this episode. But Lisa tells her husband, “The bottom line is, like, I love Meredith. I care a lot about her.”
Lisa says she has no “hostility” toward Meredith, and that she’s caught in the middle of the Meredith-Jen conflict. “I love Meredith. I will always love Meredith, but I love myself too. And I’m not going to be a punching bag for her or Jen or Mary Cosby. None of them.”
Jen and her lawyer
Jen meets with her lawyer, Clayton Simms, to go over her case. She asks him if he’s heard from her former assistant/co-defendant, Stuart Smith. (By court order, Jen and Stuart can’t contact each other.)
“We’re fighting this together, right?” Jen asks. Clayton says, “We’re not a team … but we’re not opposed to each other at this point. If he decides to take a deal, then he may try to testify against you.”
Several months later, Stuart took a deal and pleaded guilty. There’s speculation that he will testify against Jen, but it’s only speculation at this point.
Jen indicates she’s going to go to trial and she won’t take a deal because “that would be saying we’re guilty.”
Lisa lies to her kids
When Lisa’s 16-year-old son, Jack, asks how the trip to southern Utah went, she lies to him and 9-year-old Henry. “It was good. I had a good time,” Lisa says. “Overall, it was awesome.”
Not that anyone could blame her. Her kids don’t need to know what happened. At least not until they see it on TV.
Lisa, who admits she never cooks — other than maybe microwaving a hot dog — has a table-top grill that she’s cooking on with her kids and husband, John. And she’s a little carried away. “I could be, like, a celebrity chef,” she says. And, a bit later, she adds, “You know what I really want to learn to make is eggs. I’ll try.”
Is this a thing?
In the style of a gender-reveal party, Heather hosts a college-reveal party at Sugar House Park for her daughter, Ashley. It’s a relatively small gathering, and the guests include her ex-husband, Billy.
Ashley is going to the University of California at Santa Barbara … which seemed pretty obvious in previous episodes.