It’s an annual tradition now, predicting the unpredictable, guessing the unguessable, knowing the unknowable, foretelling the un-foretellable … but whoever let that get in the way? … declaring beforehand 50 things that are absolutely guaranteed to happen in Saturday’s Utah-BYU rivalry game. It’s all here. It’s all ironclad. But just like the apostle said, don’t bet on it.

Here goes …

1. Bear Bachmeier will pass for more yards than Devon Dampier.

2. Dampier will run for more yards than Bachmeier.

3. Bachmeier will be BYU’s leading rusher.

4. Wayshawn Parker will be Utah’s leading rusher.

5. Parker will be the game’s leading rusher. Watch for the chunks of yardage he picks up after first contact. It will be bump, bump, bump, and bump again.

6. The game will turn on a boneheaded mistake.

7. BYU defenders will miss between five and 10 tackles, maybe even on the same play.

8. As mentioned, Parker will break at least five tackles, maybe even on the same play.

9. Utah tight ends will catch more passes than BYU tight ends.

10. Utah tight ends will gain more receiving yards than BYU tight ends.

11. Playing in his first BYU-Utah game, Cade Uluave will introduce himself to the rivalry as a bad man with bad intentions, leading the Cougars in big hits and total tackles.

12. Third down will be a friend to the Utes, conversions arriving in bunches.

13. If LJ Martin plays, he will not be his normal, locomotive-like self.

14. Legend Glasker will catch a couple of deep balls and a fistful of short ones.

15. Glasker will run a minimum of three jet sweeps.

16. Kalani Sitake and Morgan Scalley will engage in a pregame hug.

17. Sitake and Scalley will engage in a postgame hug.

18. Braden Pegan will exceed his season average for catches per game (4.8).

19. Daniel Bray will break off a run of 20-plus yards.

20. To gas up its tepid run game, BYU will rely heavily on misdirection.

21. BYU will sack Dampier at least three times, but will whiff on tackling him more times.

22. Utah athletic director Mark Harlan will not run onto the field, yelling at the refs like a madman (even though he’ll want to), when the Cougars benefit from a controversial call.

23. Sitake will commit two fashion faux pas on Saturday; he’ll wear two varying shades of blue that do not match, and he’ll wear a hat with a BYU logo and a shirt/pullover/jacket that also has a BYU logo. Doubling up on the logo is a no-no.

24. Kyler Kasper will exceed his season average for catches per game (3.7).

25. On account of the early kick time, a broadcaster will utter some version of a phrase at some point during the first half that one team or the other “has to wake up.”

26. Despite the early start, overall attendance at the game will exceed Rice-Eccles’ listed stadium capacity.

27. Utah’s home-crowd advantage will be worth more than the supposed traditional three points.

28. The Ute offense will gain more total yards than the Cougar offense.

29. Utah’s rushing attack will gain more yards than BYU’s rushing attack, but will not get to its season average (226).

30. Sitake will sincerely speak into a microphone before, during or after the game, saying that he “loves” the Utes, and BYU fans will hate that he says it.

31. Bachmeier will pass for more yards than his season average (218.8).

32. Utah will go blitz crazy in its attempts to help the back end of its defense by making Bachmeier jumpy, attempting to hurry him up and jangle his nerves.

33. Bachmeier might get shook a bit, but he’ll figure it out with quick drops, quick passes.

34. Utah fans will hurl obscenities at BYU, but won’t chant “F—- the Mormons.” Not because they have spectacular sportsmanship, not because they’re worried about sanctions from the Big 12, rather because their head coach is one of “them,” and their fans, half of them, are made up of thousands of “them.” If they did that chant, they might as well be yelling, “F—- us.”

35. Sitake will — most of the time, anyway — go for it on fourth down when the Cougars are on the favorable side of the field, and sometimes when they’re not. “I’m easy to persuade,” is the way he says it.

36. College Football Playoff committee members will pay closer attention to the Utes and Cougars in this one game, when they’re battling each other, than at any other time this season.

37. Scalley’s voice will turn even more hoarse than it typically is, sounding by the end as though he’s spitting gravel straight out of his mug.

38. Even BYU fans and players will be moved by the Utah crowd’s “Moment of Loudness” at the break between the third and fourth quarters, missing and honoring the fallen Utes.

39. BYU will sorely miss injured cornerback Evan Johnson.

40. Each team will turn the ball over at least once.

41. An interception will be especially critical.

42. A huge special-teams play will severely impact the game.

43. Aaron Roderick will frequently turn Bachmeier loose, but when the Cougar offense is backed up tight at its own end of the field, his calls will turn conservative.

44. Kevin McGiven will pull every tool he has out of the box, utilizing plays he hasn’t yet revealed this season — and he’s already shown a lot — to confuse BYU’s defense and keep it leaning one way and then the other. Ultimately, though, Utah’s ground game will be the Utes’ buttered bread.

45. Bachmeier will throw three touchdown passes.

46. Dampier will throw two touchdown passes.

47. Byrd Ficklin will score a touchdown.

48. Most people will pick the Utes to win, favored as they are by 5.5. That’s the old saying — right? — Utah by five.

49. Most people will be right.

50. As usual, half of these predictions will be wrong.