Inside Voices: How to survive the holidays (and not blow up your relationships)

Welcome to Inside Voices, a weekly newsletter that features a collection of ideas, perspectives and solutions from across Utah — without any of the vitriol or yelling that’s become all too common on other platforms. Subscribe here.

The holidays are coming — and so is the awkwardness…

You know the scenario: Aunt Karen brings up politics over dinner. Your brother-in-law has opinions about something that deeply impacts you. Throw in grief or resentment, and the whole thing is just … bad vibes.

In America, one in five people are estranged from a close relative because of political differences.

And according to Intermountain Health Bereavement Coordinator Brandon Palmer, grief peaks during the holiday season. To cope, he suggests to “be gentle with yourself and lower expectations.”

Similarly, Becca Kearl, Executive Director of Living Room Conversations, emphasizes that leading with curiosity can foster connection, even during a disagreement.

The common theme from both experts? The fix isn’t avoiding hard conversations. It’s changing how we have them.

That said, let me know: What’s your biggest worry for holiday gatherings?

— Sam Morse, Newsletter Editor

Utah Voices

To prevent government shutdowns, lawmakers and their staff must expect to feel the sting

“When a shutdown hits,” writes Aaron Nelson, of Farmington, “it’s federal workers in Utah who suffer. TSA officers at the Salt Lake City airport work without pay. Employees at the IRS in Ogden, the largest federal employer in our state, scramble to cover bills. Workers tied to Hill Air Force Base face furloughs or unpaid labor. Park rangers, Forest Service staff, and federal law enforcement across Utah live with constant uncertainty. Meanwhile, Congress — and importantly, their staff — lose nothing.”

What next? A Democrat representing us in Congress! Are you kidding me?

“The very idea that the people would like to have a voice in Utah government is as offensive as it gets,” writes John Whipple, of Salt Lake City. “I know the state Constitution allows for ballot initiatives but those were never meant for the people to use. Those are merely playthings for us. You see, we are the only ones supposed to draft them, then we hire people to dupe others into signing them, and then you the people can just sit down and obey our laws.”

Sen. Johnson calls Judge Gibson’s redistricting ruling a ‘crisis.’ The real crisis was caused by the Legislature.

“The Legislature could have avoided all of this by simply following Prop 4: turning off partisan data, respecting community boundaries, and honoring the people’s will,” writes Arlin Cooper, of Salt Lake City. “Instead, voters were forced to rely on the courts to defend their rights. Utahns deserve fair maps drawn according to the standards they themselves approved — not according to whatever rules the majority party finds convenient.”

There is one scenario where impeaching Judge Gibson would’ve been justifiable

“If state Rep. Matt (impeach Judge Gibson) MacPherson took time from his ‘trade mission’ — aka vacation in India — and actually read Gibson’s 90-page decision, he might learn the following: … That Judge Gibson originally ruled against the plaintiffs,” writes Bob Gilchrist, of Millcreek. “The Utah Supreme Court (all appointed by Republican governors) then ruled that the Legislature was wrong in striking down and/or amending Proposition 4.”

Share Your Perspective

With all of the division across America, one issue seems to be drawing bipartisan consensus: the algorithms are making things worse.

Earlier this month, Sen. John Curtis, R-Utah, and Sen. Mark Kelly, D-Ariz announced that they’re co-sponsoring a bill that would hold social media companies legally liable for real-life harm.

Do you agree? Should digital companies be responsible for what happens IRL? What responsibility do these companies bear when algorithmically generated division leads to real violence?

From Bagley’s Desk

Drop Us a Note

I’m always looking for unique perspectives, ideas and solutions that move our state forward. Learn more about our guidelines for an op-ed, guest essay, letter to the editor and more here, and drop me a note at voices@sltrib.com.