Gordon Monson: This Bear Bachmeier kid might be good, real good. BYU will find out in the weeks ahead.

So … what do you want to know about BYU’s 69-0 victory over Portland State on Saturday night at LaVell Edwards Stadium?

It was as lopsided as a guppy facing off against a Great White, as a Rottweiler taking on a muskrat, as … well, you fill in the sentence … as lopsided as a [blank] doing battle with a [blank]. As lopsided as a Kalani Sitake cartwheel? Yeah, something like that.

BYU used its resistance to spark the scoring onslaught that burped and belched for a minute on offense, but not for long after linebacker Jack Kelly scooped up a blocked field goal, returning it 54 yards for a touchdown, commencing the numerical wipeout that sat at 49-zip at the half and pretty much marinated from there, the Cougars invoking a mercy rule as best as they could in the second half.

Those third and fourth quarters weren’t worth a whole lot competitively speaking — it was 55-nothing in the third period — not that the first and second stanzas were.

But observers got to see freshman quarterback Bear Bachmeier lead an attack that swamped an inferior opponent left to suffer through its beating. Portland State got what it needed out of this game — namely, a payday that could help float the Vikings’ athletic department in a multitude of ways, all budgetary. But you had to feel for the athletes on the field who were lambs being slaughtered.

Bachmeier only played in the first half, throwing for 97 yards and 3 touchdowns and running for 32 yards and 2 scores. After the Cougars’ initial possession, which ended in the unimaginable — horrors — a punt, he looked more like a wise, old sage than a smooth-faced teenager who had never played in a college game before. He managed the attack with poise, completing 7 of 11 throws, running to daylight when called upon to do so, and finished with a passer rating of 227.7.

The kid might be good. Real good. He certainly was against a struggling FCS program, anyway, a team that in two games thus far this season has yet to score a single point. The question that remained was this: What did the crushing prove about BYU? To be blunt, nothing conclusive. Those revelations will have to wait for when the Cougars play an actual football game against an actual opponent.

But what was accomplished, in addition to Bachmeier getting a taste of live action, limited though it was, was the same for the rest of the Cougars — on offense, on defense, on special teams. They ran through their scripted designs and intentions in every phase, making it look easy, which it genuinely was, enabling them to get comfortable in front of their home crowd, to bump pads and hats a bit, and to prepare for tougher teams in the weeks ahead.

BYU toyed with the Vikings in the second half, achieving one truly notable feat — Will Ferrin’s school-record 56-yard field goal. A kick like that would have been laudable, regardless of what opponent BYU was playing. The Cougars were able to run the ball at will, and pass it just for fun. Backup QBs McCae Hillstead and Treyson Bourguet got into the act, and just about everyone in blue went home happy.

There were a few goofs committed, but overall, BYU’s performance was clean and satisfying for them. Sitake is rarely completely delighted, but he found almost nothing legitimate to complain about, which is to say, he got what he wanted in this exhibition. Maybe even enough to do that cartwheel.