‘This…is going to be fun’ — Cautious lawyer Dallin Oaks remembers Russell M. Nelson as a decisive, surprising LDS leader

From his first day as prophet-president of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Russell M. Nelson stunned the man who had been sitting by him for 34 years.

“I was not prepared for what happened in January 2018, when he became our president with the mantle of the prophet settled upon him,” apostle Dallin H. Oaks said Tuesday during Nelson’s funeral service. In the past, the former judge said, his “best friend,” who died Sept. 27 at 101, was “never as active” in quorum councils, where others — mostly lawyers, he joked — dominated.

Then came the death of the late President Thomas S. Monson.

“Suddenly,” Oaks, who, at 93 years old, is next in line to lead the global faith, said, “I saw Russell M. Nelson as a decisive church decision-maker.”

Wedded with this determined nature, the morning’s other speakers agreed, was boundless energy, an upbeat personality and genuine love for those he served.

“Just as the Good Shepherd knows, names, and numbers his sheep,” President Camille Johnson, leader of the women’s global Relief Society, said, “President Nelson always called me by name.”

But it was Oaks who offered an extraordinary peek behind the curtain of church councils and gave members the best sense of Nelson as an unhesitating leader.

“Imagine how that transition looked to his fellow apostles, some of whom were former lawyers,” accustomed to the slow and careful work of committees, Oaks said as the concluding speaker. “I came to understand that his professional work, as a surgeon, assumed … there was no time for postponement for [surgeons] to make further study and no opportunity to ask for a continuance.”

On that first day of Nelson’s tenure in 2018, when the apostles were discussing a regular task of the governing First Presidency, the new president asked: “Why do we do this? Let’s stop doing it.”

Figuratively speaking, Oaks said, “I tightened my seat belt a few more notches and said to myself, ‘Being a counselor in this First Presidency is going to be fun.’”

‘Girls, the church is true!’

As a father, Nelson was, daughter Laurie Marsh said, a constant whirlwind of cheerful activity, a man who whistled around the house and skipped on walks.

The family hiked, skied and fished together. At home, there was music — singing, Nelson’s organ playing and Handel’s “Messiah” during Christmastime.

“When I think of our dad, I think of joy,” Marsh said. “Daddy always chose to be happy, and that made him so fun to be around.”

This joy, Marsh explained, was inextricably tied to his love and devotion to his faith.

“I remember many times, especially on particularly beautiful bluebird snow ski days,” she recalled, “we would sit on the ski lift looking at the beautiful surroundings and he would take a deep breath and say, ‘Girls, the church is true!’”

‘Tireless in his service’

Russell M. Nelson Jr., the late prophet’s only son, recalls accompanying his father on his many church assignments, including during the senior Nelson’s time as an apostle.

“One experience I had was during my high school years,” he said. “I was fortunate enough to go with my parents to Europe, where my dad had several assignments over a three-week span.”

Those “several assignments” turned out to be a dead sprint from one European country to another.

“After 10 or so days,” he said, “I recall thinking to myself that it was exhausting, and I was 14 years old.”

His father, in contrast, was in his 60s.

“He was,” the younger Nelson said, “tireless in his service.”

Nelson’s call to the women of the church

The church does not practice female ordination. Nevertheless, Relief Society President Johnson, a former lawyer, described Nelson as a leader who empowered women by challenging them to “work to understand the gift of God’s power, priesthood power, accessible to every woman and man who makes and keeps covenants in the House of the Lord.”

She quoted Nelson’s 2019 General Conference sermon, "Spiritual Treasures," in which he stated: “The heavens are just as open to women who are endowed with God’s power flowing from their priesthood covenants as they are to men who bear the priesthood.”

Johnson concluded: “The truth that God’s power is accessible to women has registered upon my heart and changed my life.”

Always ‘perfectly groomed’ and willing to listen

Nelson was “the man for whom the word ‘gentleman’ was created,” said apostle Jeffrey R. Holland. “He was dignified and courteous with every man and woman he met, be they diplomats or other dignitaries, new neighbors or complete strangers.”

Even Holland’s mother noticed that approach, telling her son that he was her “second favorite apostle” — after Nelson.

“It was worth it to have such a remarkable friend who loved and treated me as courteously,” Holland said, “and as kindly as he did them.”

And no matter how tired he was from a trip, the apostle said, Nelson was “always perfectly groomed and carefully attired as he stepped off the plane, casting that patented Nelson smile on those he met and to whom he spoke.”

As Nelson’s second counselor, apostle Henry B. Eyring witnessed the prophet-president’s “ability to help each person in a meeting to feel that his or her opinion on a particular matter was important to him…I believe [his] final decision about a given matter was influenced by the information provided by others. He sincerely sought for and received counsel.”

Eyring added that Nelson “received revelation from the inspiration of others.”

‘Like a warm and loving father’

As part of his leadership approach, Nelson met with various councils and committees and “received all these leaders wisely — not like a judge identifying soft spots in presentations,” Oaks said, “but like a warm and loving father, glad to see their work and always ready to approve or counsel or encourage.”

Nelson showered the same kind of “welcoming qualities on the many very important visitors or groups whose requests to meet the First Presidency were granted,” Oaks said. “They included nations and religious faiths, some of which our church had previous little contact or experience.”

In every such visit, his counselors “marveled at the impact President Nelson had on these leaders,” Oaks recounted. “They came to meet him. His smile, the warmth of his voice and the power of his presence melted hearts. He asked about their families and their countries. Very often these interactions moved beyond mere formalities to genuine friendliness and common interests.”

Without hesitation, Nelson introduced outsiders to the Book of Mormon, the faith’s signature scripture, reading verses aloud and, with tears in his eyes, declaring the book’s truthfulness and power to change lives, Oaks said. “In all of this I recognized that I was seeing and hearing one of Israel’s most powerful missionaries in action.”

His writings, influence and example “will live on,” his presumed successor said, adding, “Let us not forget these great contributions to his life and influence nor falter in expressing our thanks for them.”

Oaks ended with a quote from an unnamed leader of another faith, who said, “He will be remembered not only as a prophet, but as a bridge-builder, healer and a man whose life bore witness to the power of faith in action.”

Going forward, Oaks is expected to select two members of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles to join him as part of the faith’s governing First Presidency.

Nelson’s death also opens up a vacancy in the quorum that Oaks is expected to fill around that same time.