According to Robert Gehrke’s recent commentary, many Utahns are opposed to the new state flag design. Me too! Some say it is too woke, that it erases our history. Others complain that the prominent feature of the design, a beehive, is an overt acknowledgement of Utah’s dominant faith. Yeah, even I picked up on that. I suggest we scrap the new design and come up with a newer, better one. One that more honestly reflects our state’s core values. First off, bring back the seagull and add the silhouette of an AR-15. Point the AR-15 at the seagull.
What if we divided the flag in half? On one side of the flag is a beautiful soybean plant. On the other side is an empty river. Or, show an empty Great Salt Lake on the flag. Beneath it is our new state motto. Best asbestos in the West!
Instead of the beehive, let’s be a bit more obvious. I envision a grand temple in the background. In the foreground is a homeless encampment.
I see a child pictured on the flag. She is standing in front of her school, holding her report card. A large F is circled. Beneath her are words that all of us can relate to. Edumacated in Ewtah.
Finally, and this is my favorite, show the back end of a large diesel pickup truck. Black gunk billows out of the truck’s tailpipes. Below it, another state motto. Utah! Come for the jello, stay for the PM 2.5.
Mike Dunn, Draper