Sean P. Means: What we learned at the movies this summer

It's Labor Day weekend, which traditionally means the end of summer — not according to the calendar (where summer doesn't end until Sept. 23, the first day of autumn), but in practical terms, such as kids' vacation schedules or outdoor concert venues.

Hollywood's idea of summer pays no attention to the solstice. It starts the first weekend of May and ends with the last box-office receipts of Labor Day.

Over that time, we have encounters with superheroes and singers, dinosaurs and disasters, rappers and rockets, a young girl's emotions and a young woman's chemotherapy.

Here are some of the things we have learned at the movies this summer:

• In the future, every movie will be connected somehow to a Marvel superhero movie. ("Avengers: Age of Ultron," "Ant-Man")

• Also in the future, Marvel Comics characters who were exiled from the Marvel Cinematic Universe (because of studio dealings) will be welcomed back into the fold. ("Fantastic Four")

• Not everything Disney touches turns to gold. ("Tomorrowland")

• If Reese Witherspoon is going to produce her own projects, she really needs to read the scripts first. ("Hot Pursuit")

• "Imperator Furiosa" may be the coolest character name ever — and, after watching Charlize Theron play her, it's completely appropriate. ("Mad Max: Fury Road")

• There are, after all these years, ways to make "Don't Stop Believin' " sound good. ("Pitch Perfect 2")

• In a battle between Dwayne Johnson and anything — including an earthquake — always bet on The Rock. ("San Andreas")

• People in Hollywood really have it in for the Golden Gate Bridge. ("San Andreas," "Terminator: Genisys")

• Paul Feig is the only director who can handle Melissa McCarthy. ("Spy")

• Amy Schumer is scathingly funny, never more so than when she's making herself the target of her jokes. ("Trainwreck")

• It is possible to outrun dinosaurs, even in heels. ("Jurassic World")

• '60s nostalgia is dead. ("The Man From U.N.C.L.E.")

• Typecasting sometimes works, especially if you're Lewis Black representing the emotion of anger. ("Inside Out")

• Some remakes don't need to be made. ("Poltergeist 3D," "Fantastic Four," "Hitman: Agent 47")

• Some sequels don't need to be made. ("Terminator: Genisys," "Magic Mike XXL," "Minions," "Ted 2," "Sinister 2")

• Movies that fall somewhere between sequels and remakes? Meh. ("Vacation")

• But as long as Tom Cruise is turning himself into the American version of Jackie Chan, risking life and limb for our entertainment, he can churn out as many franchise pictures as he wants. ("Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation")

• There is a surprising amount of drama in the act of creating music. Also, if you need someone to play a jerk in the music industry, Paul Giamatti is your guy. ("Love & Mercy," "Straight Outta Compton")

• Do not doubt Jake Gyllenhaal's ability to commit to a role. ("Southpaw")

• Do not doubt Meryl Streep's ability to inhabit a role. ("Ricki and the Flash")

• Emma Stone has been ill-served by her directors. ("Aloha," "Irrational Man")

• Sometimes a young-adult novel can yield a tender, touching look at life and mortality. ("Me and Earl and the Dying Girl")

• Sometimes a young-adult novel yields nonsense. ("Paper Towns")

• Adam Sandler is the laziest person in Hollywood. ("Pixels")

• Marketing departments are the least creative people in Hollywood, seeing as how they can't figure out how to sell anything with an original screenplay. ("Dope," "Ricki and the Flash," "American Ultra," "We Are Your Friends")

Sean P. Means writes The Cricket in daily blog form at www.sltrib.com/blogs/moviecricket. Follow him on Twitter @moviecricket. Email him at spmeans@sltrib.com.