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Ask Ann Cannon: Our next vacation is coming up, and I’m worried my husband will do what he always does on our trips — nothing!

(Francisco Kjolseth | The Salt Lake Tribune) Ann Cannon

Dear Ann Cannon • I like vacations where you do things — see as much as you can, as fast as you can! After all, you’ll never fit everything in you want to do, even if you live to be 100. My husband, on the other hand, would rather sit on a deck somewhere, looking at the ocean and reading a book, interacting with as few people as possible. Our next vacation is coming up. What do you suggest?

— Vacation Warrior

Dear Warrior • I promise I’ll get to your question, but please excuse me for a minute while I have a flashback.

OK. I’m remembering the very first vacation I ever took with my husband and his family. We went to Bryce Canyon. In the winter. When it was cold. How cold was it? It was so cold that our noses froze to death and fell straight off our faces into some nearby snow banks. We also went cross country skiing for hours and hours. Then we went back to the motel and ate healthy food. Instead of watching TV, we sat around and engaged in intelligent conversation. Then it was time to go to bed. But not before my mother-in-law took apart the motel room’s light fixtures and cleaned the dead moths out of them.

Wow, I whispered to my husband that night. You guys are, like, the Rambos of Leisure!

This vacation was unlike any I’d ever been on before. When we traveled, it was in conjunction with my dad’s work. He’d leave early while the rest of us stayed in bed forever, which you can do if you pull heavy black curtains over the windows. When we finally we got up, we ate some crackers and Cheez Whiz for breakfast, put on our swimsuits, then schlepped over to the pool where we spent the rest of the day getting sunburned until it was time to eat pizza for dinner. After that, we watched old movies on TV and played cards, which gave our dad the opportunity to teach us the proper way to deal. (Dealing to your right will get you shot in Vegas, FYI.) If we had any spare quarters, we’d fire up the Magic Fingers and fight over who got to sit on the edge of the bed first. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, please google “Motel 6 Magic Fingers” and be prepared to get jealous that you didn’t have my childhood.)

Anyway, to say I was initially traumatized by my in-laws’ vacationing style is to put it mildly.

My point? Yes! Human beings want different things from vacations — a reality that you and your husband have encountered. So. What to do? Here are a few suggestions.

1. Alternate the types of vacations you take together. You plan one vacation. He plans the next. Promise each other ahead of time you’ll both be good sports and play along.

2. Combine your preferences. Go on a cruise where one day is devoted to sitting on the ship’s deck and the next is filled with sightseeing.

3. Go your separate ways while you’re on a vacation. You don’t have to do everything together as a couple, right? He can sit on the beach with a book while you go into town to look around. Reconnect over dinner and share what you both did that day.

4. Go on separate vacations. Not always, obviously. But sometimes. My husband didn’t want to walk across England with me, so I went with three girlfriends instead. To this day he is THRILLED that he didn’t go trudging through muddy sheep pastures in the rain. How muddy were those sheep pastures? Muddy enough to suck the shoes right off your feet. But whatever. I’m glad I did it. Especially now that I’m not actually doing it.

One more thing. Don’t be surprised if your separate styles eventually fuse into something that is distinctly your own jam. It’s possible that you might even switch places with one another. These days, for example, I’m the one who wants to hike whereas my husband? Yeah. Give him a book and a beach chair and he’s happy. Surprise!

(P.S. Have fun!)

Do you have a question for Ann? Email her at askann@sltrib.com or visit the Ask Ann Cannon page on Facebook.