* While Jeremy Friedbaum has been eliminated as a state Senate candidate, scuttlebutt still spreads through the GOP convention about the time Friedbaum said he was told by God to run for Congress and actually forced Rep. Chris Cannon into a Republican primary. Sen. John McCain, the convention's keynote speaker, then announces from the podium that he never said any such thing to Friedbaum.
* Top Republican financial donors are apprised that, because of recent events, the $10,000-per-person fundraiser to go on a hunting trip with Vice President Dick Cheney has been canceled. They are offered, for the same price, to go on a fishing trip with Mike Leavitt instead.
* Speakers at the Democratic Convention proudly declare that their party is the party of inclusion, welcoming all ethnic groups, no matter what their sexual orientation or income level. Then, all Mormons are asked to leave before voting commences.
* Republican leaders, at their convention, read a statement from the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, asking for tolerance and love toward all groups. The Republicans' Conservative Caucus then convenes an emergency meeting to form its own church.
* State Sen. Parley Hellewell, who also was eliminated at the Utah County Convention, announces he will be a candidate for chairman of the state Republican Party in 2007. An anonymous letter later circulates throughout the convention floor claiming that others whose names have been mentioned for party chair subscribe to Playboy and favor using blown-up condoms as balloon decorations at high school proms.
* As a way to raise badly needed campaign funds, the Democratic Party surprises delegates by turning the convention into a live auction, announcing that the U.S. Senate nomination to oppose Orrin Hatch in November will go to the highest bidder.
* The Republican Convention turns into a discourse about the need for a good Republican to step up and run against Salt Lake City Mayor Rocky Anderson in 2007. The convention organizers then surprise delegates by bringing onto the stage actor, comedian and pundit Ben Stein, who proceeds to dead-pan the line: "Buhler? Buhler? Buhler?"
* Congressman Jim Matheson, the only Democrat who has been successful in seeking a major office in Utah in a decade, is introduced at the Democratic Convention. Two-thirds of the delegates then walk out of the convention, protesting that Matheson is not a real Democrat. It's not clear if they mean he is not a real Democrat because he is not liberal enough or because he actually won three elections.
* U.S. Senate candidate Mike Ridgway takes over the podium at the Republican Convention and for the next four hours he lectures delegates on the rules and regulations of the Utah Republican Party. By the time he is through, everyone has left. So he wins the nomination over Orrin Hatch, 1-0, by voting for himself.
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Paul Rolly welcomes e-mail at prolly@sltrib.com.
