Info: Opens today in theaters everywhere; rated PG-13 for sexual content and language; 101 minutes.

This strained romantic comedy is a "chick flick" for dudes, written by Neanderthals. Patrick Dempsey plays Tom, an arrogant Manhattan playboy with only two positive character traits: He's kind to dogs, and he has a great best friend in Hannah (Michelle Monaghan). When Hannah leaves for a six-week work trip in Scotland, Tom realizes he's really in love with her - and is crushed when she returns with a hunky Scottish fiancé (Kevin McKidd, late of "Journeyman"). Director Paul Weiland ("City Slickers II") expends much effort on exaggerated pratfalls and an astounding concentration of penile humor (e.g., Hannah, working as an art restorer, is positioned so she appears to be performing oral sex on a male nude painting) that nearly got the movie an R rating. The script, besides rehashing the worst parts of "My Best Friend's Wedding," is so backward-thinking that it still believes it's funny and shocking for the male lead to be mistakenly identified as gay. Unless you're already charmed by "McDreamy" Dempsey, his plodding portrayal of this thoroughly unlikable guy will have you rooting for the Scotsman.

Flawless

Info: Opens today at the Tower Theatre; rated PG-13 for brief strong language; 108 minutes.

Heist movies don't come more dry or lifeless as this one, a stuffy period piece set in a prestigious London diamond firm in 1960. Executive Laura Quinn (Demi Moore) is bumping her head on the firm's glass ceiling when she's approached by Mr. Hobbs (Michael Caine), the firm's janitor, with a proposal: If Quinn can get the access codes for the vault, Hobbs can slip in and nick a few diamonds from the stock and nobody will notice. Director Michael Radford ("Il Postino") lavishes attention on the movie's look - from the firm's burnished paneling to the well-groomed insurance investigator (Lambert Wilson) - that he scarcely notices that Edward Anderson's debut script is a snoozer, larded with scenes of corporate intrigue that aren't very intriguing. Still, Moore holds her own with Caine, who's always a treat to watch.