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Ranking the football coaches in the Pac-12 is both a tricky and dumb thing to attempt to do because there are so many factors to mix in beyond the number of games won and lost, although, ultimately, that's how coaches are measured and judged.

Listening to the coaches talk at Pac-12 media days, from the quirky humor of Mike Leach to the straight-ahead honesty of Chris Petersen, from the affability of David Shaw to the measured common sense of Kyle Whittingham, brought the comparisons to mind.

Here, then, is a foolish attempt to size them up like Berkshire hogs at the county fair and rank them in reverse order, according to their strengths and weaknesses.

12. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado. Sorry, but the Buffs have not yet been able to put it together under MacIntyre, who stepped into a Ralphie-sized mess in Boulder and has pretty much stayed there. There's been progress, but only a basic lean in the right direction. In his three seasons, Colorado has won 10 games and lost 27. In conference, the record has been worse, including last season, when the Buffaloes finished 1-8. They've been competitive in some of their losses, but … is that supposed to be a sign of success?

11. Clay Helton, USC. The totality of Helton's head coaching experience before now has come in two brief interim stints with the Trojans, once in a bowl game in 2013, when Ed Orgeron quit, and last season after Steve Sarkisian took a leave and then was dismissed. His overall record is 6-4. Helton spent his career coaching running backs, receivers, quarterbacks and coordinating offenses. There's a load of pressure on him this season, and he says he welcomes it. We'll see.

10. Sonny Dykes, Cal. Maybe he hasn't turned the Bears' program around, but he has redirected it in a positive direction, which is exactly what Dykes did at Louisiana Tech. You've got to like a head football coach at a Pac-12 school who started his career as an assistant high school baseball coach. You don't have to like a head football coach who in six seasons has an overall losing record.

9. Gary Andersen, Oregon State. Hate to rank Andersen, a terrific coach who made the most of his tenure at Utah State and succeeded at Wisconsin, this low, but for now, it's where he belongs. Everybody knew the Beavers would break off teeth in Andersen's first season in Corvallis, and they did, gumming their way to just two wins.

8. Mark Helfrich, Oregon. Helfrich is a really smart dude, a whiz kid who everybody knew had a big brain, a football brain with formations dancing around in there somewhere. Since taking over for Chip Kelly, he's put up glossy records with the Ducks. That's the frick. The frack is that your Aunt Gertrude could have done the same with the kind of facilities and talent the Ducks have.

7. Rich Rodriguez, Arizona. The layers to Rodriguez's career are deep. He started his head coaching run at Salem, then Glenville State, then West Virginia, then Michigan, and now at Arizona. Overall, he's got a record of 153-104-2. Along the way he innovated on offense with the spread, he ticked off everybody in Morgantown, he struggled at Michigan and he's added life to a limp program in Tucson. Last year's 7-6 record with the Wildcats was a letdown after Rodriguez's teams went 26-14 over the first three seasons.

6. Todd Graham, Arizona State. Perhaps Graham deserves to be higher on this list. He did win the South in 2013. He's gone 34-19 with the Devils and put together a head coaching record of 83-48 at Rice, Tulsa, Pitt and ASU. But last season's 6-7 mark threw a rock into the coach's travel bag and interrupted the momentum the Sun Devils seemed to be gaining.

5. Jim Mora, UCLA. Mora caromed around the NFL, heading the Falcons and the Seahawks, but left the pro ranks with a losing record at 31-33. His stint with the Bruins started in 2012, leading UCLA to a 9-5 record, finishing first in the Pac-12 South. Since then, he's gone 28-11, twice finishing second in the South. With the kind of talent Mora attracts at UCLA, more can be done.

4. Mike Leach, Washington State. Few college coaches could claim to have followed a path anything like Leach's. It's had color, controversy, lawsuits, remarkable wins, disappointing losses, huge offensive production, and a fascination with pirates. But after the record he posted at Texas Tech, where he won 84 games against 43 losses, Leach has now seemed to correct a program at Washington State that some thought was uncorrectable. In his first three seasons in Pullman, Leach went 3-9, 6-7, and 3-9. That was before a 9-4 mark last year. And the Cougars have promise for more of the same this time around.

3. Chris Petersen, Washington. The Boise State years were incredible: two undefeated seasons, seven double-digit win totals, three one-loss seasons, and 12 defeats in eight years. It's been a bit more difficult at Washington, where Petersen is 15-12 with two straight 4-5 league records. Many prognosticators are high on the Huskies now, believing the coach has finally put his team in position to contend for a Pac-12 title.

2. Kyle Whittingham, Utah. Whittingham has grown through his 12 years as lead dog, going 95-46 overall and guiding the Utes' transition into the Pac-12. After three consecutive losing seasons in the league, Whittingham has had two straight winning runs, including last year's 6-3 record. His program's reputation around the conference mirrors his own — a strong, rock-steady presence that presents a formidable challenge to opponents. The fact that Utah has grown into that role has surprised many around the league, but it exists, nonetheless. If the Utes had featured more prolific offenses, with more cohesion on that side of the ball, Whittingham might have taken the top spot.

1. David Shaw, Stanford. Shaw followed Jim Harbaugh with no trouble, leading the Cardinal to great success: seasons of 11-2, 12-2, 11-3, 8-5, 12-2. His teams have won league titles in three of the past four seasons. Stanford is favored again this year to add another stellar showing. He's made being smart an attractive attribute to a brutal game. In some ways, it's not fair. The brainy kids are now beating the daylights out of everybody else.

GORDON MONSON hosts "The Big Show" with Spence Checketts weekdays from 3-7 p.m. on 97.5 FM and 1280 AM The Zone. Twitter: @GordonMonson.