At about 5-foot-6 and well over 150 pounds, she doesn't look the part of a typical high school athlete.

"I played softball. I didn't make varsity but I was on JV," said Knighton, a senior at Bountiful. "The coaches kept saying, 'I can't believe you can do this' because of my size. I think people stereotype that you don't do anything if you're bigger. I think people look down on bigger people."

The questions didn't stop in volleyball, either. Knighton thought people questioned if she could be as athletic as the other girls. She vowed she wouldn't play the sport in high school, and that's when Knighton got into discus throwing and shot-putting. There, she felt she wasn't judged by her height or weight.

"I think with other sports, girls do struggle with body image," Knighton said. "But not with track. There are so many sizes of people."

When Kit Zeigle was a cross country runner at Bingham, she, too, had body image issues.

"It all started in the eighth grade. I was eating really healthy, but I was increasing my exercise far beyond," said Zeigle, who recently recovered from bulimia. "I became compulsive."

These two girls - Knighton, who is strong and solid, and Zeigle, who is slender and toned - seem to be on opposite ends of the spectrum. But they are struggling with the same issue - society's unattainable image of beauty for girls and women.

Struggling with societal ideals

What does it mean to be skinny? For Knighton, it meant fitting in with her peers. When she started playing sports, she felt she attracted unwanted stares and whispers asking, "How could somebody that size be athletic?"

"Just with how everyone else looked, I looked different from them," Knighton said. "It took me, like, three or four years [to get over body image issues]. I would think, 'I could be taller, I could be skinnier and I wish I could fit into these jeans.' "

Because of her body size, Knighton felt she never fit in with her teammates and ultimately, didn't fit into society's ideals of what a true athlete looks like.

Getting skinny wasn't the point for Zeigle. Being lean and toned was more important to her. But even as she increased her exercise and decreased her food intake, Zeigle never was satisfied.

When Zeigle was in the eighth grade, she didn't look up to Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera as having the ideal body. She looked up to Regina Jacobs, a U.S. middle distance runner and 24-time national champion, who had a very low body fat percentage during her career. But for Zeigle, even the most perfect body could use some adjusting.

She developed an eating disorder, and at the height of her anorexia, her 5-foot-8 frame dropped to 69 pounds. For Zeigle, the quest for the perfect body didn't end.

"You always compare. There's someone better," Zeigle said. "I thought anorexia could get me the body I wanted. In society, it's all about money, wealth and body image. No matter what you do, that will always be an issue."

All eyes on you

High school games can be a nerve-racking atmosphere. All eyes are on you, whether it's the people in the crowd, players from the opposing team or your own teammates. Even the uniforms can add pressure.

"With sports, [insecurity about body image] could be magnified," said Justine Reel, an associate professor in the Department of Sport Science at the University of Utah. "These athletes have an audience. They're like celebrities."

Reel has done studies on the relationship between uniforms and so-called aesthetic sports such as swimming, gymnastics, figure skating and cheerleading. In a study called "Slim Enough to Swim," Reel found that not only is there the pressure of fitting into a revealing team uniform, but also there is "the additional pressure that comes with the perception held by many top swim coaches that lower body weight and body fat improves swimming times."

"I asked athletes about where they experience pressure," Reel said. "And the uniform is the No. 1 pressure."

That's what it was like for Knighton, who had to squeeze into spandex and a tight-fitting jersey - a typical volleyball uniform - for matches when she was in eighth grade.

That was the biggest reason she didn't want to play volleyball in high school.

"I wanted to do sports in high school," Knighton said. "But [the uniform] sends out the message that you're supposed to be small."

When ordering uniforms this season, Brighton volleyball coach Kathy Mendenhall made sure to order the uniforms bigger than in years' past. She didn't want the players to look like their jerseys were painted on.

"Since the time I was a girl, clothes are a lot more revealing," Mendenhall said. "We didn't want the shirts to be so tight fitting and, you know, it's just as important today as 25 years ago that body image is so vital to their self-esteem."

What feeds the pressure is female athletes' natural tendencies to want to please teammates and coaches. A 1997 study by the President's Council on Physical Fitness said females, in general, are more internally motivated by self-improvement and goals related to team success. They also appear more motivated by a cooperative, caring and sharing team environment.

In short, some of the characteristics that make a good athlete also make for bad self-image problems.

"There are a number of risks [with eating disorders] that we've identified and some of the characteristics tie into what makes a good athlete," Reel said. "Perfectionism, high expectations and achievements, competitive. I think sport will always, in terms of competitive nature, have its own set of ideals, and society's message on appearance is a compounding effect."

Sports - help or hinderance?

When Knighton joined the track and field team and began throwing the shot put and discus, she noticed the anxiety over body issues slowly slipped away. There was no more worrying about what people thought of her and she not only became comfortable in the sport, she excelled. She used her frame to her advantage, so much so that she became the Class 4-A state champion in the discus throw and took second in shot put.

So much so that an ex-Olympian, Bish Dolegiewicz, saw potential in Knighton and is now coaching her. Finally, Knighton had found her place in sports.

"There's no struggle with body image now. I've accepted that's who I am," Knighton said. "Sports shields you, it's a barrier. I can say I'm a thrower. Sometimes, I wish [my body] was different, but there's not much I can change. That's who I am."

While sports helped Knighton develop a positive body image, it had the opposite effect on Zeigle.

Although Zeigle's eating disorder wasn't spurred by sports, it gave her a reason to continue with her anorexia.

As a runner, it didn't hurt to lose a few extra pounds.

"Running became a part of anorexia. It evolved and I performed better when I did it. It consumes you," Zeigle said. "Some people say, 'If you're lighter, you run faster.' It gives you the advantage to push through."

Zeigle eventually got over anorexia by the end of her senior season at Bingham, but she didn't let on that the anorexia was actually slowly turning into bulimarexia, a combination of anorexia and bulimia.

When Zeigle started training for triathlon, she knew she had to stop purging herself to be successful. But the endorphins she got from throwing up before a long bike ride fueled her to keep going.

"It made me excited for it," Zeigle said it. "It gave you an extra boost."

Women and sports

In a physical sense, sports can only be positive. It keeps young girls and teens in shape and healthy. But in a psychological sense, where do sports stand? Do sports promote healthy body image or is it just an extension of society's ideals of what's healthy and fit, and ultimately, beautiful?

"Sports is a microcosm of society," Reel said. "Sports reflects what we value in our society. Some athletes have eating disorders but sensitivity is universal, it's across the board."

That may be why in women's collegiate sports, it's still rare to see the athletes' weight and height printed in the media guide.

And Megan Marsden, the associate head gymnastics coach at the University of Utah, thinks that won't change anytime soon.

"With society now, we want to make it better for the gymnasts," Marsden said. "Listing the weight would be worse. Different body types carry weight differently. It's more about body composition."

Knighton, who aspires to be a thrower in college, said she would only feel comfortable with revealing those numbers if it was clear she was an athlete. But in any other situation, she would hesitate.

"They'll think differently if they know," Knighton said.

Will girls ever be comfortable enough with themselves, or will media and societal standards always have their place in sports?

As long as there are women in sports, there will be a drive for winning, a drive for perfection and a drive for reaching the unattainable - even if that's a number on a scale.

mthach@sltrib.com

DEALING WITH PRESSURE

* Body image issues are something females in all sports struggle with, not just so-called aesthetic sports like swimming, gymnastics, figure skating and cheerleading.

* Justine Reel, an associate professor in the Department of Sport Science at the University of Utah, conducted a study and found the pressure to fit well in a uniform is the No. 1 pressure in women's sports.

* Anyone struggling with an eating disorder can call the New Life Center hot line at (801) 281-3353.