Hopefully we have now run out of political correctness crusades, the U. having "solved" the horrible inequality inflicted by the game-day singing of our fight song, "Utah Man."
Jeez, none of us ever realized that every time we sang the word "man," we were dissing the distaff side of the collegiate equation. And to think that all those women sitting in the stands or the MUSS (Mighty Utah Student Section) had been unwitting dupes to this century-long conspiracy to demean themselves – and in public no less (gasp!). Are our coeds mighty or just the fairest?
Changing "man" to "fan" only pays homage to political correctness so earnestly sought in this faux gender-protection campaign, while cleverly not interfering with the rhyming needed to retain the bonfire gusto required when sung by all Utes – whether FANs (fake American Natives), real Ute Indians, or converted Cougars.
Must the lyrical correctness police now determine if we are actually warbling "fan" or "man"? Expanded use of instant replay might be needed to be sure, or maybe the school song should simply be hummed to avoid anyone feeling bad after tailgating.
"I am a Utah Fan, sir!" … sir? Really? Let the next crusade begin.
Salt Lake City
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