This is an archived article that was published on sltrib.com in 2011, and information in the article may be outdated. It is provided only for personal research purposes and may not be reprinted.

Taxes will play a big part in who gets to be our next president. The candidates all claim to have a tax plan for America that is fair, simpler and will spare America from being foreclosed on by the Chinese.

The tax plans vary (sometimes wildly) but all come down to the same thing: armed robbery. If you don't think so, try not giving your money to the government next April and see what happens.

There are all kinds of taxes: stamp tax, poll tax, toll tax, square tax, sales tax, oxygen tax, ax tax, max tax … it's impossible to keep up. One thing is for certain: Every year it gets more expensive to live in the land of the free.

For the record, I have not followed what the candidates are saying about their tax plans. I stopped listening when Herman Cain announced his plan. Frankly, 9-9-9 sounds way too much like 9-1-1.

The one plan we don't want is any sort of flat tax proposed by Mitt Romney. He's a Mormon. Because I'm one, too, I know how a Mormon flat tax works. It's 10 percent of everything you earn, otherwise known as tithing.

In most other churches, tithing is paid according to the wants/needs of those doing the offering. It can range anywhere from $1 to $1 million.

Not for Mormons. For us it's a flat 10 percent right off the top. There are no deductions, brackets, write-offs or loopholes in "flat tithing." Rich, middle class, or poverty-stricken, everybody pays that same percentage.

It sounds really fair, but it's not. Ten percent to a billionaire is less of a tax than 10 percent is to a single mom with six kids.

But flat tithing doesn't stop there for Mormons, which is what makes Mitt's plan potentially so dangerous. He may say flat tax, but that's just the start.

In addition to flat tithing, there's also welfare or fast offerings. Once a month, deacons visit the homes in an LDS ward collecting money for the needy.

You can just imagine how a Mormon president might factor that into the equation. Once a month, a couple of guys from the IRS ring your doorbell and give you the "opportunity" to share even more of your money with the poor.

Then there's the annual drive by the Boy Scouts of America. Once a year, Scouts in my ward come by looking for additional funding for a program called "Friends of Scouting."

If Mitt gets elected, the parallel program will be "Friends of NATO." Once a year, soldiers will drop by your house and peel off some more of your paycheck.

It keeps going this way until you realize that you're committed to a faith where everything you own is technically for the building up of Zion. Or in this case, the government.

It's true that unlike taxes, tithing is supposed to be voluntary. That sounds nice, but I fail to see how voluntary something can be if you go to hell for not doing it.

Flat tax, flat tithing. They both mean the same thing: flat wallet.

Robert Kirby can be reached at rkirby@sltrib.com or facebook.com/notpatbagley.