Jell-O haiku contest: Invasion of gelatinous gems from readers

The point of Tribune’s 6-year-old contest? Don’t take the wiggly stuff too seriously.

By Kathy Stephenson

| The Salt Lake Tribune

First Published Nov 20 2012 01:48 pm • Last Updated Mar 06 2013 11:33 pm

Utahns have always made a place for Jell-O on the Thanksgiving table, right next to the turkey, stuffing and mashed potatoes.

But this year molded gelatin practically took over the city — or a least our entry box — as some 800 poems were submitted in The Salt Lake Tribune’s annual Jell-O haiku contest.

Most of these funny, three-lined poems came from Utah residents, but we did get a batch from a 9th grade honors English class at Florida Atlantic University High School, in Boca Raton. Students had been studying Chinese poetry when teacher Debbi Rosenblum happened to find our contest online and made it an assignment.

"I thought it would be a lot more fun than writing a traditional haiku," she wrote in an email.

And that’s the point of this 6-year-old contest — don’t take Jell-O too seriously.

Of course, the only way to properly handle so many gelatinous gems was to bring in the experts from the Utah State Poetry Society, who judged the poems for proper style and creativity.

Here are their first, second and third place winners in the adult and student categories, as well as some honorable mentions to enjoy along with your pumpkin pie.

ADULT WINNERS

1st

Coo chi coo Haiku,

Jell-O — please me — make me drool,

All I want is you.

— Joy Hall

2nd

You slide down my throat,

Jiggly friend to my tummy.

My joy is complete.

— Charles Bell

3rd

Sweet melting powder

rich fruity fume I breathe deep

cold raw roots encased

— Kymberly Siebenhaar

—

SECONDARY WINNERS

(7th - 12th grade)

1st

Pet horse recycled

That’s how I pay for college

Please don’t tell mommy

— Hannah Bishop

2nd

The vegans will cry.

Tonight Seabiscut will die.

Now he is Jell-O

— Arthur Etmekdjian

3rd

Masticating is

an optional endeavor

before swallowing

— Alex Merrill

—

ELEMENTARY WINNERS

(kindergarten-6th grade

1st

House made of Jell-O

When I’m grounded and hungry

I just eat a wall

— Griff Riggs

2nd

Red and blue Jell-O

Democrat, Republican

Stands for our nation

— Carly Herr

3rd

Explosion of taste

Vast oasis of Jell-O

Earthquake in a bowl

— Kira Sincock

—

Adult Honorable Mentions:

The jell swells greenly

Flowing over plastic rim

Sweet nectar of hooves

— Nori Huntsman

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