There are no Utahns on this season of The Bachelor (7 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4), but the Beehive State still gets dragged into the middle of this phony reality show.\
Juan Pablo, "who liks to call himself 'El Bachelor," and the women come to the Beehive State and do the same dumb stuff they do everywhere else.
I couldn't make this up, so here are excerpts from ABC's release about tonight's episode and the adventures of :
"The Bachelor ... surprises his date mid-air when he changes into a glow-in-the dark athletic outfit - complete with a neon heart - and then gifts her with her own sparkling sporty ensemble. When they land in Salt Lake City, they are led to the starting line of the "Electric Run " - the world's premier nighttime 5k run. The two are surrounded by hundreds of enthusiastic runners, but will Kat survive the chaos and make it to the finish line to accept Juan Pablo's rose?
"Next, 13 women meet up with the handsome single dad for a photo shoot benefitting Best Friends Animal Society, an organization that focuses on the plight of animals in need. Each bachelorette is assigned a dog and takes a photo with the pup and Juan Pablo. However, when several revealing costumes are unveiled, two women go into an emotional tailspin and have second thoughts about whether they should continue with the shoot. Lucy rushes to the aid of one of her struggling counterparts by offering to go "au natural." But at that evening's after party, one woman steals the spotlight when she has a meltdown over not getting one-on-one time with Juan Pablo and derails the night. Will Juan Pablo forgive this bachelorette and chalk up the outburst to nerves or will this be the end of the line for her?"
O. M. G.
Elsewhere on TV ...
How I Met Your Mother (7 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Marshall tries to deliver a final, devastating slap to Barney.
American Ninja Warrior: USA vs. Japan (7 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): American winners vs. Japanese winners in Las Vegas.
Almost Human (7 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13): Maldonado investigates the ambush that nearly killed Kennex.
Heart of Dixie (7 p.m., CW/Ch. 30): Lavon and George try to keep BlueBell from merging with another town.
NBA (7 p.m., ROOT): Denver Nuggets at Utah Jazz
Being Human (7 and 10 p.m., Syfy): Josh is trapped inside his wolf. (Season premiere)
Major Crimes (7 and 9 p.m., TNT): Rusty takes the stand against Phillip Stroh 2 Broke Girls (7:30 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Max is falling for her pastry-school partner.
Mike & Molly (8 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Molly decides to take a break from writing but can't figure out how to fill her time.
Sleepy Hollow (8 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13): Evil forces target Captain Irving's daughter.
Beauty and the Beast (8 p.m., CW/Ch. 30):
Bitten (8 and 11 p.m., Syfy): This Canadian series is about a young woman bitten by a werewolf who's drawn into a big battle between rival packs. (Premiere)
Mom (8:30 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Christy really needs her mother's help but doesn't want to admit it.
Intelligence (9 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Tori's life is threatened.
Castle (9 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4): A murder investigation leads to Castle's father (James Brolin).
The Blacklist (9 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): Red is determined to discover who betrayed him.
Switched at Birth (9 and 11 p.m., ABC Family): Daphne bonds with an injured pre-med student.
The Fosters (10 pm., ABC Family): Callie runs away.
Archer (11 p.m., FX): Someone on the team dies. (Season premiere)
Chozen (11:30 p.m., FX): Premiere of this animated series about an aspiring rapper who's trying to get his life back on track after a stint in prison.
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