You have said the single most important strategy to getting what you want out of life is to be prepared to walk away. Please explain.

We should go into every negotiation with the attitude that says, "I will only do this deal if it's going to result in what I want. If not, I am prepared to leave without completing the deal." With that attitude, we will never end up with one of those situations where we only got a part of what we wanted, or perhaps got what we wanted but with too great a cost involved.

How do you know when to forgo the idea

altogether?

With preparation, we start with a clearly defined set of expectations of what we think is going to occur and what we want in terms of an outcome. Most people, in my experience, miss this critical step. They think that going in and doing the best they can is a good plan, when it's really not a plan at all. Being "conscious" is all about watching for signals that the momentum is moving in the desired direction at the desired pace. We must remember to periodically do a reality check about what's really happening around us. And when we do, it may be clear that this idea is not going to go anywhere and we should simply drop it. Otherwise, we continue trying to push something that has no likelihood of a positive future.

Explain how karma comes into play in negotiations.

Deals can and should be done with a win-win attitudeÂ. Treat others as you would prefer to be treated yourself and it will always be to your benefit. Harm others at your own peril - people's memories last a long time. Some people take pride in the fact that they can squeeze every last thing from others in negotiations. This type of person will brag afterward about how they forced others to pay more, or to give up more than was necessary to get the deal done. At some stage, however, that braggart will get into a negotiation with someone who has what he or she really wants. It's then when the karma can come home.

In your book, "21 Ways Women in Management Shoot Themselves in the Foot," you say women's ideas may be credited to others. Why?

In all communication, we need to remember to talk to the "audience" as they talk themselves. If we use styles, approaches or terms that are unfamiliar, the message may simply be lost. There is some impact of biology involved here - for example women's voices are higher and consequently may get drowned out by things like air conditioners or overhead projector machines in a meeting room where the males' lower and louder voices are heard over the ambient sound. So they actually may not be heard by everyone. Then, someone may simply restate the woman's good idea, but he may end up as the person who everyone thinks came up with it.

Do women also present ideas differently?

Many women have a tendency to present an idea as a question. For example, a group is asked by the boss for ideas to improve profits and a woman may respond by saying something like, "What if we reduced our advertising expenses?" This may be a great idea, but it may not be recognized as a recommendation because of how it was stated. Someone else - perhaps a guy - may offer a similar comment such as, "You know, I think we need to reduce our advertising expenses; they're not giving us what we need anyway." That person gets the credit for something offered up by the woman but never recognized as a recommendation.