On the one hand, The Washington Post has reported that Roy Moore made advances on numerous women when they were in their teens and he was in his 30s. On the other hand, though, he thinks America was last great when slavery was still legal and “families were united.” (This could not have been less true under slavery, a system of absolute brutal disregard for the family that tore families apart and enshrined rape.)
But then again, on a third hand, he thinks that repealing all the amendments after the 10th would “fix a lot of problems.” (Poof! Women’s suffrage is gone! Poof! Slavery is back!)
But then again, on a fourth hand, he was removed as a judge for refusing to take down a monument to the Ten Commandments.
But then again, he was suspended a second time, also for failing to respect the law. But then again, he thinks women are unfit for office. But then again, you have to remember that he has no regard for the Constitution. But then again, Stephen K. Bannon, a nightmarish human being who runs Breitbart and has helped bring the alt-right, writhing and squirming, into the light of everyday conversation, is a big fan and has been working hard to make Roy Moore happen.
But then again, Moore has said that evolution does not exist and that believing in evolution makes people act like animals. But then again, maybe we wanted to re-enact both “To Kill A Mockingbird” and “Inherit The Wind” and come to the wrong conclusions.
But then again, if we do not vote for Moore, there will be no way to get through ill-advised jury-rigged tax reform plans that kick the middle class in the gut and run away laughing. After all, who doesn’t sometimes want to push the republic all the way to the edge just to feel something?
But then again, maybe, months ago, just when President Donald Trump said he would need more information before denouncing the KKK, the Republican Party discovered that it had forgotten its safe word and could not stop all this horrifying white-supremacist dog-whistle roleplay, and it has finally ceased struggling.
On the other hand, if you ignore everything he has ever said or done in the course of his entire public life and imagine he is someone different, Moore is a pretty good person to have in the Senate.
It is important to hear both sides.
Alexandra Petri writes the ComPost blog, offering a lighter take on the news and opinions of the day. She is the author of “A Field Guide to Awkward Silences.”
Alexandra Petri