One of my favorite legislative comments came from former Rep. Frances Hatch Merrill during a debate in the House over proposed minimum mandatory sentences for child sex offenders. The debate had narrowed to the issue of whether there should be an exemption from the harsh sentences for those who commit incest (I know what you're thinking. But, you know, Utah and all).

As the debate got more and more heated, Merrill stood and declared: "I didn't even know what incest was until I joined the Utah Legislature."

That was in the mid-1980s. About that same time, Rep. Merrill introduced a bill to crack down on subliminal messages in advertising. During the debate, supporters had difficulty defining exactly what would be banned. After all, it was subliminal.

Merrill presented an "expert" who testified about the evils of subliminal messaging. The expert, when he was not exposing subliminal messaging, earned his living as a part-time ballroom dance instructor.

The highlight of the testimony came when he presented a bottle of whiskey and told representatives that in order to get people to buy liquor, producers would put subliminal images of naked women on the bottle. Legislators looked and looked, but they couldn't see the naked woman.

That's because it was subliminal.

Also during the 1980s, Utah was loath to follow most of the other states and officially name Jan. 15 Martin Luther King Day. The legislators danced around the sticky issue of perceived racism by proclaiming that many people had done great work on civil rights and they all should be recognized.

Then Rep. James Moss came up with the solution. He proposed it be called "Utah Peoples Day," to recognize all Utah peoples.

In the early 1990s, former Rep. Frank Pignanelli sponsored a bill making it illegal to have sex with animals. The House voted it down. One legislator lamented during the debate: "Rep. Pignanelli just doesn't understand the pressures on the farm in rural Utah."

Former Sen. Paul Rogers once introduced a resolution in the Senate declaring South Africa's racist policy of apartheid a "righteous" system. He had proposed the resolution at the request of a constituent with the last name of Flake who was making that argument for his master's thesis at BYU.

Rogers had Flake testify before the Senate to make his argument. During the questioning period, then Sen. Frances Farley asked him to state, once again, his last name.

"Flake," he said.

"That's what I thought," she said, and then sat down.

Before Sen. Chris Buttars, there was Sen. Jack Bangerter, who was not shy about expressing his opinions.

During a debate on a bill requiring medical providers to keep the identities of AIDS patients confidential, Bangerter said, "I think we should paint them red and green and put them on Antelope Island."

Former Sen. Verl Asay, who often sponsored morality bills, was arguing one time about why the Legislature should regulate cable television programming in order to eliminate smut.

"The kids these days need someone to watch over them," he said. "If I didn't have someone watching over me when I was a kid, I wouldn't be in the Utah Senate today. I'd probably be in a bar somewhere watching pornography."

Later in the session, radio host Tom Barberi was making a presentation to the Senate. From the podium, he said, "Sen. Asay, I've got the Playboys you ordered in the back room."

To Asay's credit, he laughed the hardest at Barberi's joke.