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In her final year in the military, Air Force mortuary officer Valerie Larabee was called upon to care for four families grieving the suicides of fellow airmen.
"It really impacted me emotionally, but I couldn't even go to the base chaplain to talk about it, because I was just so fearful," she said. "I knew that he would ask, 'Who else do you have in your life that can help comfort you?' And I knew I couldn't tell him."
The U.S. Supreme Court declined to hear arguments Monday in a case challenging the constitutionality of the military's controversial "don't ask, don't tell" policy, which bans openly gay people from serving in the U.S. military.
Gay-rights activists, including Larabee, the director of the Utah Pride Center, decried the court's decision, which let stand a lower court ruling in favor of the ban. They said it would permit the military to continue to treat tens of thousands of gay and lesbian service members as second-class citizens.
"I am really hopeful about how things are going in our country right now and I feel like we have some tremendous opportunities," Larabee said. "But this is disappointing."
Noting the ongoing wars and the nation's floundering economy, Larabee said she understands there are other pressing matters for Congress, the White House and the nation's highest court to consider.
"But do I think our issues are every bit as important as those? Yes, I absolutely do," she said, adding that she
Larabee spent 10 years in an Air Force uniform before resigning her commission in 1995 -- two years after the Clinton-era law, which was thought of by many as a step forward for gay rights -- went into effect. She said that she would have liked to have continued serving her country, but she couldn't keep living a lie.
"I would still be in the military today if I didn't have to lie about who I am," she said. "My military service is the thing that I'm most proud of in my life."
Having to keep secrets from those who are supposed to be brothers and sisters in arms "ends up causing a lot of anxiety," she said. "It's shameful that we should have to do that."
But gay service members might not have to keep up the pretense for long. Author Nathaniel Frank said he figures the policy might last another two years, given the country's need for service members at a time of war and a national sentiment he believes is moving in the direction of gay rights.
In his book Unfriendly Fire: How the Gay Ban Undermines the Military and Weakens America , Frank writes that gay service members have been forced out of service since the Revolutionary War. The first recorded case was in 1778, when Lt. Gotthold Enslin was kicked out of the Army in a ceremony in which an officer's sword was broken over his head after he was caught in bed with another soldier.
Set against 230 years of military history, Frank said, Monday's ruling is a blip on the radar.
"I wouldn't think too much of this," he said. "The court has a tradition of deferring to military and congressional judgment."
He believes that President Barack Obama, though slow out of the gate on ending the ban as promised during his campaign, "still wants and needs this -- and it should be played out not in the courts, but at the White House and in Congress."
There appears to be some movement on the issue in Congress, where California Democratic Rep. Ellen Tauscher has convinced 150 of her House colleagues to co-sponsor a bill that would end the ban. The Obama Administration, meanwhile, has made no specific move toward ending it and has declined to step in to stop the dismissal of gay service members, such as West Point graduate and Iraq War veteran Lt. Dan Choi. He is being processed for discharge from the Army after publicly disclosing that he is gay.
In an open letter to the president, the New York National Guard member took issue with the idea that his sexuality was a detriment to good order and discipline in his unit.
Much to the contrary, he wrote, "I refuse to lie to my commanders. I refuse to lie to my peers. I refuse to lie to my subordinates. I demand honesty and courage from my soldiers. They should demand the same from me."
More than 230 service members have been kicked out of the military under the policy since Obama took office, according to the Service Members Legal Defense Fund.
The case was filed by James Pietrangelo, a former Army captain discharged from the military for being gay. He was originally part of a group of 12 plaintiffs who were dismissed under the policy because of their sexual orientation.
The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 1st Circuit in Boston rejected the suit last year. Pietrangelo appealed to the Supreme Court on his own, while most of the other plaintiffs asked the court to not to review the case, preferring to allow the Obama administration to deal with the issue.
Source: Associated Press
