Not his wife. Not his newborn daughter. When Aaron Hardman used to wake up, the first thing he thought about was a fix.

By that time, his drug use had escalated from marijuana to painkillers to heroin and cocaine. And at least a fifth of whiskey each day.

He had used drugs for nearly 11 years and tried to quit several times, but something would happen and he would relapse. Hardman said he finally sought help "when drugs and alcohol was something that I had to have every day ... in order for my body to operate, in order to have any peace in my life."

He took a swig of Mountain Dew while telling his story Thursday in the hallway of the Salvation Army dormitory -- his home for the past seven months.

He and 11 others in the Salvation Army's Adult Rehabilitation Center for men have spent the past week making Thanksgiving dinners for charity.

By Thursday, Hardman couldn't stand the smell of turkey, but conceded it's great to help others.

And charity is a key to rehabilitation, said Major James Sullivan, the Salvation Army Salt Lake area coordinator.

"It's very therapeutic to give back to your community," Sullivan said. "And most of these patients in the past have taken, taken, taken. They've taken from their families, from their loved ones, from their community."

At the substance treatment center, more than 60 men learn giving is better than getting, Sullivan said. They live and work together, go to group and individual therapy, receive Christian teachings, as well as volunteer.

The men cooked meals for another homeless shelter's Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday and their own family night on Wednesday.

On Thursday, they prepared 600-plus dinners for Meals on Wheels. An additional 200 volunteers delivered those meals across the Salt Lake Valley to people restricted to their homes due to illnesses or physical and mental disabilities.

Last year, Greg Stechschulte was in the program preparing the food. This year, he's back as a volunteer, handing out to-go trays.

"Part of my life right now is giving back," Stechschulte said, who had been homeless for five years and addicted to crack cocaine.

Walking past Stechschulte, Ron Richards brings out new trays of turkey.

Richards has been in the treatment program for four months -- "the best time of my life," he said of getting his self-esteem back and getting "a taste of God, too." He said the group is like a family.

But he can't believe so many people showed up to help give out the meals. He never volunteered much before being at the center, and now he smiles and chats with the other volunteers.

"It makes me stand up with my chest out and my head held high -- I used to be on the other end," said Richards, who is recovering from his crack cocaine addiction. "I think this might be the best Thanksgiving I ever had -- I never helped so many people. I just feel good."

It's a form of therapy "for a man in recovery to know that 'I'm helping,'" Sullivan said.

Hardman says the volunteer work keeps him grounded, humble and makes him feel like he has something valuable to share, plus, he adds, "it helps keep me sober."

But during his addiction, Hardman just wanted to escape.

In 2005 he was diagnosed with a cancerous adrenal tumor, two weeks later his wife found out she was pregnant. He used higher and higher doses of painkillers to get through his five surgeries, radiation and chemotherapy treatment.

"My addiction cost me my home, my relationship with my family, my marriage," said Hardman's whose cancer is in remission.

He knew he needed some spiritual guidance to become sober, Hardman said, as well as the Salvation Army's scholarship to pay for treatment.

Now, nearing the end of his program, Hardman thinks cooking could become a career, and more importantly. "I have the support of my family again, I have a good relationship with my daughter -- now I can be a father."

mariav@sltrib.com