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The United States has never seen a presidential race like this one or a candidate like Donald Trump, and the stress of it all led a software engineer from Lehi to seek the help of a therapist.
Jeremy Stanley has had a hard time getting to sleep and when he's awake, he struggles to focus. At times, he withdraws from his family. When Hillary Clinton's poll numbers began to improve, his stress ebbed, but it hasn't gone away and probably won't, at least until this election is over. And then, it all depends on the outcome.
"I face almost paralyzing anxiety about a possible Trump presidency," he said. "I can't help but think America is on the verge of destroying itself."
Stanley isn't alone. Other Utahns say this raucous presidential race has them searching for a way to cope with an undeniable sense of dread. Some are trying deep breathing exercises and meditation. Others are cleaning compulsively, while others are ducking conversations with certain friends and family or avoiding the news.
But this is an election that is almost impossible to ignore and will become an even larger topic of conversation in its final weeks. Trump found himself embattled this week after the emergence of a video showing him talking about groping women in a way that would be sexual assault. It led to calls for him to withdraw from some Utah Republican leaders and leaves his campaign on shaky ground.
The first debate, viewed by 85 million people, set a record and Clinton and Trump are set to square off again in a town hall-style forum Sunday evening. At this point, Stanley's not sure he can take it, but he says whether he tunes in or not, he'll read about the confrontation the next day.
The Salt Lake Tribune, in conjunction with the Utah Public Insight Network, asked readers to answer an online questionnaire about the emotional turmoil of this contest and nearly 100 people sent in their thoughts. (The survey went out before the lewd video of Trump emerged Friday.) A few said this race hadn't raised their blood pressure, but most had a reaction similar to Stanley's, that this is an election like no other, and Trump is a candidate unique in his ability to trigger anxiety, not because of his personal behavior but about how he might wield the power of the presidency. That didn't necessarily mean, however, that they liked their other options.
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Scary choices • Pat Ames, from Taylorsville, is no fan of Clinton, believing she is a political opportunist who has focused on her career at any cost.
"I don't like her. I don't think she is an honorable person and it disgusts me as a woman that she has stuck with her philandering husband solely to advance her political ambitions," said Ames, referring to former President Bill Clinton's infidelity while in office.
And yet…
"Unless Clinton does something really, really, really horrible, I'm going to vote for her just as a vote against Trump," she said. "The thought of him in the White House scares the crap out of me."
Ames, an independent who has voted for presidential candidates from different parties over the years, has reorganized her garage more than once in recent months, a reaction to her rising election-related apprehension. Her normal six or seven hours of sleep has dwindled to about 4 ½ hours and she wakes up dreaming about politics.
Her fear is Trump could entangle the United States in another war, possibly a nuclear one.
That's also Heather Sather's terror. She's a 68-year-old retired social worker and proud Clinton supporter, who said no other election in her lifetime has caused her this much stress.
"These seem like really perilous times," she said, worried Trump might provoke a conflict with North Korea. "I fear for a nuclear war because I believe he is literally a mad man."
And yet she can't pull away from the race, saying "you are drawn to your fears."
In past contests, she would be unhappy if a Republican won and she said she was even "heartsick" when Ronald Reagan beat Jimmy Carter in 1980.
"But I wasn't afraid of what would happen to this country or what would happen with this country in relation to the wider world," Sather said. "But I'm afraid now."
To cope, she's tried swimming and reading to relax and has had long talks with her husband. But she has a sister and a friend who are steadfastly opposed to Clinton, creating tension in her home.
"We don't talk about it but Trump is the elephant in our family room," she said. "It is very painful."
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Coping • Jonathan Swinton is a marriage counselor and he's had the presidential race come up during couples therapy sessions where one supports Trump and the other Clinton. Often the couple tries to avoid the conversation and he doesn't necessarily think that's a bad strategy. The election will be over in a month and with deeply held views sometimes it is better to learn to disagree.
But he knows it is not as easy to avoid political discussions at work, with friends and especially on social-media platforms like Facebook and Twitter, where discussions can quickly turn into spats.
"Then something that wasn't personal becomes personal," said Swinton, who ran for the Senate as a Democrat this year, only to lose in the primary election. "Social media makes it worse because the filters are off."
People are more blunt online and more willing to fight than they would be in person.
Sather has repeatedly gotten worked up over the Facebook comments of her acquaintances, some of whom have used derogatory words or openly hoped for Clinton's death. But the ones that really get under her skin are the posts that are inaccurate, such as a recent comment that the Clinton Foundation only used 10 percent of its money on charity, when in truth, 88 percent of its spending went to charity.
"I think this [election] is different in terms of the level of lying and accusations," she said.
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Firing Washington • Wayne Robinson, a 70-year-old Vietnam veteran living in Santa Clara, doesn't like Trump either, but sees him as the only chance to change a Washington, D.C., culture that he believes is corrupt. And he sees Clinton as part of that corruption, finding her mishandling of at least 113 emails that had classified information while secretary of state as a disqualifier.
"I can't vote for a woman I view as a criminal. I am retired Army. If I had been as careless with secret documents as Mrs. Clinton, I would be in Levenworth [prison] making big rocks into little ones," he said. "How did we get into a situation like this? A choice between a criminal and a buffoon. Is this the best that Democrats and Republicans could come up with?"
Robinson is a Republican, but he wants to support a more moderate candidate. He named former Utah Gov. Jon Huntsman as the type of presidential nominee he could get behind.
"The only reason I would vote for Trump is that we need someone in Washington who would make a change," he said. "His experience with firing people would be a good thing because I think we need to fire half of the bureaucrats in D.C."
Many of the coping mechanisms Tribune readers mentioned are good places to start, Swinton said, things like exercise, breathing exercises, cleaning and meditation. But if election-related stress is leading someone to lose sleep persistently or to be agitated, then that person should seek the help of a doctor or a counselor, as Stanley did.
Stanley, though, said his experience wasn't a great one. The therapist he saw didn't seem very empathetic. He hasn't gone back.
John Ward's coping technique is fairly simple. He tries not to think about the race and avoids the topic at work.
A Mitt Romney-type Republican, Ward does talk to his wife about the election because they agree on a "Never Trump" stance.
Trump's rise early in the primary season caused him concern and he's grown only more alarmed as Trump became the nominee and kept pace in national polls.
"It scares me that he even has a chance," said Ward, who lives in West Jordan. "How did my party elect this guy? How did our nation get so politically divided that people feel they need to vote for their party's nominee even though he is morally corrupt?"
Ward is planning to vote for Clinton, though he's doing so grudgingly. He disagrees with her on social issues like abortion. He's worried about the more liberal Supreme Court justices she would nominate.
"I wouldn't say she is corrupt, but she is shady," he said. "As a public servant, I feel like you have to be more open than she has been."
But all that said, he believes Clinton would try to do what she thinks is right for the United States, even if he disagrees with what that might be. He thinks Trump would do what is right for Trump.
— This story was informed by sources in the Utah Public Insight Network. To become a news source for The Salt Lake Tribune, go to sltrib.com/upin.
Presidential debate
Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton will debate Sunday at Washington University in St. Louis.
Time • 7 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. MST
Moderators • ABC's Martha Raddatz and CNN's Anderson Cooper.
Watch • Live- streamed on sltrib.com or on major broadcast and cable news networks.