This is an archived article that was published on sltrib.com in 2015, and information in the article may be outdated. It is provided only for personal research purposes and may not be reprinted.
In support of the outrage over the massacre of French journalists who allegedly insulted the Prophet Muhammad, I could run a picture of him in this column. I won't.
Not because I'm afraid of being attacked. When it comes to that, I'm actually more afraid of my own people. It's that I can't draw. So you'll have to use your imagination.
Instead of my regrettable face, imagine a caricature of Muhammad. It can be anything from the regal image of Sean Connery in "The Wind and the Lion" to a loony, dark-bearded Yosemite Sam chasing Bugs Bunny through the desert. That should do it.
Several years ago I received an email from someone who drew a cartoon of a bare-chested LDS Church prophet rocking nipple rings and S&M leathers. The cartoon ran in a college newspaper. With predictable results.
Because I'm something of a lampoonist myself — and a Mormon — the cartoonist wanted my take on why the caricature made so many people furious. Where was their sense of humor about it?
Didn't people understand that nipple rings on a Mormon prophet was just a bit of outlandish satire? What did I think of the cartoon? Was I offended?
I had to admit that I wasn't. But that's just me. Like my church's missionary program, I long ago raised the bar on what it takes to offend me. I'd first have to respect the person trying to do it. Anymore that amounts to people I care deeply about, a number that gets smaller every year.
Accidentally offending people over something they hold sacred is one thing. Doing it deliberately is another. Case in point: the street preachers who sometimes sling around LDS temple garments outside General Conference, hoping to provoke a confrontation.
That doesn't offend me either. All it ever does is remind me of how shallow their commitment is to their cause.
They only do it because it's protected by the First Amendment, it upsets Mormons, and, most important, they know we won't kill them for doing it.
Frankly, if they wanted to impress me with their Christ-like devotion to spreading the Good News through insult, I'd like to see them try that #%$@ in front of a mosque in Damascus. Now that would earn my respect, although not my condolences.
Who gets to say what's sacred in a free society? How far should a person have to go to avoid insulting what other people revere or practice?
Seems a fair question in the wake of the massacre perpetrated by nut jobs who say they were doing it to teach people to respect Muhammad when what they really wanted to do was just kill some people.
The world could respond to this hideous act by insulting all Muslims. Maybe we should come up with bumper stickers, posters, T-shirts, buttons, fliers, flags and anything else featuring a picture of Muhammad.
If everyone sported one of these, it could make his image so ubiquitous that it might take some of the hypersensitivity out of it.
Maybe that's why today you can actually find pictures of LDS temple garments on the church's own website.
Putting the image of Muhammad on coffee mugs and beer coasters might seem like a good idea, but it's not something I'd do.
I'm not as concerned about offending radical crazies as much as I am being respectful of the decent Muslims I know.
Robert Kirby can be reached at rkirby@sltrib.com or facebook.com/stillnotpatbagley.