Returning from a routine spring break a few years ago, a handful of exhausted students in Donna Freitas' dating class at St. Michael's College launched a quiet revolution against the "hookup culture" that dominated their lives.

Students at the small Catholic school in Vermont told Freitas they were tired of alcohol-fueled casual sex and theme parties where young men and women role play "CEOs and Office Hos." These norms were destructive, they said, but they felt powerless to resist. They yearned for real romance that would include talking or a walk in the woods. They weren't interested in abstinence but wanted more meaning in their sexual experiences. They decided to start a campuswide conversation about sex to see if they were alone in these frustrations. It was an immediate success.

From that experience, Freitas went on to conduct a nationwide study at seven colleges -- two Catholic, two private, one public and two Evangelical. She surveyed 2,500 students online and conducted in-depth interviews with 63 women and 48 men. She explored the relationship between spirituality and the pressure to hook up, or have a physically intimate encounter with someone with whom you are not in a long-term relationship.

Surprisingly, Freitas discovered very little connection between students' faith and their sexual decisions. Her conclusions, laid out in Sex and the Soul: Juggling Sexuality, Spirituality, Romance, and Religion on America's College Campuses, have caused a lively conversation among clergy and educators.

Since the book's publication in April, Freitas has been inundated with invitations to speak at schools across the nation. Parents, sociologists, ethicists, administrators, athletes and pastors from every faith tradition have sought her perspective. Students line up by the dozen to speak to her in person after lectures.

"Far too many college students feel as if they are faced with an either/or proposition," Freitas writes. "The prevailing religious message about sex among students is either to guard purity with one's life or to see sex as irrelevant to one's spiritual practices and religious commitments."

Disconnecting faith from sexuality » Freitas found, for example, that sexual behavior at Catholic schools is no different than what goes on at the public and private schools. Many Catholic students told the researcher their church offered no help navigating today's murky sexual seas. The only instruction they got, they said, was "don't do it."

"Some [students] literally laughed out loud at Catholic teachings on sex," Freitas says.

But Molly Dumas, spokeswoman for Juan Diego Catholic High School in Draper, said that's unfair.

"We address the multifaceted topic of sex in several curricula," Dumas says.?"It is incorporated into our health classes in their junior year, theology classes and various science classes. … We believe that addressing sex-related issues from several angles better equips students to make those tough moral decisions when they are on their own."

Last year, Juan Diego students read the book A Girls Life On-line, a memoir by Katie Tarbox detailing her account as a teen victim of an Internet sex predator. Later, school officials invited Tarbox to the school to share her experience with students and parents, as well as the public.

"It opened up a dialogue that gave us, as administrators, a better insight as to the culture students are facing," Dumas says. "We think it's helpful to address all the facets of sexuality in a variety of classes, and not be squeamish about moral hot topics."

At the St. Catherine of Siena Newman Center adjacent to the University of Utah campus, Catholic students can meet and discuss sex issues with fellow believers.

"We definitely promote Catholic teachings about no cohabitation before marriage and sex within marriage only," says Carla Zilaff, a student lay minister. "The Newman Center provides a safe place away from sororities, fraternities or the dorms. We try and stress Catholic values for people who want that in their lives. It's countercultural and it's a safe environment."

View from Utah » In Freitas' study, only the Evangelical schools escaped the hookup culture, with their emphasis on chastity and the explicit connection between their faith and behavior.

"There is stress in a culture of chastity," she says, "but the conversation about sex, romance, faith, religion that exists on these campuses is at a far higher, more complex level than I saw anywhere else."

She believes Mormon students follow a similar pattern. Like other conservative Christian faiths, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints prohibits premarital sex for any couples who want to marry in one of the faith's temples. Chastity is a requirement for attending Brigham Young University.

Even without sex, romance and dating are common at BYU, Heidi Harris said in a presentation this summer at the annual Sunstone Symposium, an independent forum for Mormon thought. And there are lots of jokes about the tension.

Harris, a Mormon and one of Freitas' students at Boston University, cited a popular BYU Facebook group titled "I Am Saving Myself for Wild, Passionate, Awkward Honeymoon Sex." She also mentioned a 2002 survey by BYU sociologist Bruce Chadwick, which concluded that only 3 percent of the school's single students said they had had sex.

"Students may have underreported their sexual experiences out of fear of the honor code, or a sense of shame or embarrassment," Harris said. "But even so, the percent is remarkably lower than the 60 [percent] to 70 percent average on other campuses."

The chastity standard applies to Mormons at public schools such as Utah Valley University, Utah State University and the University of Utah.

"There's a very good attitude among students about being social and getting to know the opposite sex," says Elaine Englehart, who teaches philosophy at UVU. "They put their boundaries on those relationships."

But that doesn't mean all Mormon students are forgoing sex. They just may not be telling.

"In the LDS culture, there is a strong fear of being found out," Englehart says. "As a student, you can be disciplined by the church for it or get kicked out of BYU."

At the U., there is much more openness about sexuality among some of the population. Durex, a national condom company, had a booth at the recent Wellness Fair on campus.

The U. is "definitely different than a lot of other campuses. The sexual culture is not as prevalent because of the high percentage of religious students," says Ben, a 22-year-old U. student who declined to give his last name. "But there's plenty of hooking up. It's a natural part of the college experience."

Peggy Fletcher Stack writes about religion and spirituality. Reach her at pstack@sltrib.com or 801-257-8725.