That's the premise behind Fox's new fall crime thriller, "Standoff," which premieres Tuesday at 8 p.m. on KSTU Channel 13. It continues Fox's Death March of Fall Shows.
Believe it or not, that's what producers of "Standoff" want - a witty drama that mixes the tension of a hostage crisis with the sharp repartee of "Moonlighting." That's far from what they got.
It stars one of my favorite actors, Ron Livingston (''Band of Brothers,'' ''Office Space''), as Matt Flannery, an FBI negotiator who co-leads the elite hostage negotiation team with his secret girlfriend Agent Emily Lehman (Rosemarie DeWitt).
In the pilot, while trying to gain the trust of a frustrated father who's holding his son in a car, Flannery confesses to the kidnapper and all the police around him that he's having an affair with Lehman, which raises the eyebrows of his fellow agents. How this was relevant to the kidnapper, I don't know.
Anyway, that ignites a premise that there's tension in Flannery's and Lehman's live-in situation as volatile as a hostage standoff (get the metaphorical connection?). That will lead to other hostage situations where the two conflicts clash.
For example, witness the give-and-take dialog of the pilot episode:
Hostage Taker: Give me what I want or the girl gets it!
Agent Flannery: Look man, I know how bad it can get. My girlfriend can be a real pain sometimes, too!
Agent Lehman: (To Flannery) Hey, you didn't say that last night when we were together giving each other a "thorough interrogation"!
Agent Flannery: (To Lehman) Shut up! Can't you see I'm trying to talk to the man! And by the way, I didn't like the fact you left without saying goodbye.
Hostage Taker: Um, guys. I'm over here. You know, the one with the knife who's about to kill everyone unless you get a plane and a million dollars.
Hostage: Maybe you ought to just cut my throat.
OK, it doesn't quite go down like that in the first episode, but that same air of irrelevant domestic squabbling goes on between the two negotiators, and it tends to defuse any tension in the room with the hostage-takers.
Apparently, the FBI does allow couples, even married ones, to work in the same unit. "Standoff" shows that's not a good policy. No wonder we have a major intelligence-gathering failure in this country.
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Television columnist Vince Horiuchi appears Mondays and Fridays. He can be reached at vince@sltrib.com or 801-257-8607. For more TV insights, visit Horiuchi's blog, "The Village Vidiot," at http://blogs.sltrib.com/tv/ and catch his PopCast podcast every Tuesday at http://sltrib.com/entertainment. Send comments about this column to livingeditor@sltrib.com.
Channeling
Behind the Camera: The Unauthorized Story of Diff'rent Strokes: KSL Channel 5, tonight, 7. Another TV drama about the trials of classic TV shows. This time the target is "Diff'rent Strokes' " troubled child stars.
Amber's Story: Lifetime, tonight, 7. New TV movie about the kidnapping of Amber Hagerman, whose case led to the now-famous Amber Alert system for law enforcement.
