- Warren, Boston, Mass.
Dear Warren » Tell her! Dreams can be deferred. And your fiancee's dream of a fancy wedding does not make sense right now if you can't afford to pay for it
This is an opportunity for you and your fianceé to sit down and talk through the realities of your expenses and map out your future. Naturally, things will change along the way, but if you don't look at your life through a sober lens now, you will be guaranteed unnecessary challenges in the future.
If you haven't already, engage in premarital counseling right away. Use this time to learn the ways in which the two of you think, what you value, how you approach conflict and surprise.
Dear Harriette » My home phone was cut off because I could not pay the bill. I have a cell phone and use that. For the most part, it would be fine for me not to have a land line phone, except my mother and grandmother call a lot. I am embarrassed to tell them that my phone was cut off. I don't want them to give me any money. But how do I tell them and avoid the inevitable lecture?
- Tina, Washington, D.C.
Dear Tina » You might be surprised at how compassionate your family will be. Virtually everyone is suffering right now, because of our perilous economy. Many Americans are unable to handle their basic debts these days. Bottom line: Don't lie to your family. Tell them that you have decided to use your cell phone exclusively and make sure they have the number.
Call your home-phone provider to learn the terms for either canceling your service or establishing a payment plan so as not to destroy your credit.
Harriette Cole's column runs Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays.
