Monday on TV: Pseudo-stars start ‘Dancing’ on ABC
Published: March 17, 2014 11:05AM
Updated: March 17, 2014 11:20AM
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As is generally the case, Dancing With the Stars (7 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4) is guilty of false advertising. Most of the contestants on this show are more celebrities than stars.

Some of them used to be stars and are now, ahem, has-beens. Some of them aren’t even celebrities.

It’s hard to claim fame when most people don’t know who you are.

The most recognizable names on the list are Drew Carey and Billy Dee Williams. I’d be surprised if most of you could identify all of the other 10.

They are: Sean Avery, Candace Cameron Bure, Meryl Davis, NeNeLeakes, James Maslow, Danica McKellar, Diana Nyad, Amy Purdy, Cody Simpson and Charlie White.

I knew who six of of those 10 were before I read their bios. That number would have dropped to four if I hadn’t (hint) paid attention to the 2014 Winter Olympics.

Elsewhere on TV ...

NBA (6 p.m., ROOT): Utah Jazz at Houston Rockets

How I Met Your Mother (7 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Gary Blauman shows up at the wedding.

The Voice (7 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): The battle rounds begin.

Bones (7 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13): The remains of a repo man are found in a septic tank.

Star Crossed (7 p.m., CW/Ch. 30): Grayson and Emery go on a date.

Being Human (7 and 10 p.m., Syfy): Josh struggles to get Nora back.

Dallas (7 and 9:01 p.m., TNT): Afton, Ray and Lucy return to Southfork to attend Pamela and John Ross’ wedding

Mike & Molly (8 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Molly hits it off with Peggy’s childhood friend (Kathy Bates).

The Following (8 p.m., Fox/Ch. 13): Max, Ryan and Weston close in on the mole inside the FBI.

The Tomorrow People (8 p.m., CW/Ch. 30): Jedikiah makes a surprising discovery.

Lost Girl (8 and 11 p.m., Syfy): Kenzi signs everyone up for an undercover mission.

Mom (8:30 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Christy’s father meets his grandchildren.

Intelligence (9 p.m., CBS/Ch. 2): Riley and Gabriel track an infamous hacker.

Castle (9:01 p.m., ABC/Ch. 4): A Japanese ballet dancer is murdered.

The Blacklist (9 p.m., NBC/Ch. 5): A crime lord is the next target.

Switched at Birth (9 p.m., ABC Family): Bay goes to Tank for help.

The Fosters (10 and 11 p.m., ABC Family): Zac’s mother visits Lena at school.

Bates Motel (10 p.m., A&E): Norma’s brother shows up at the motel.

Those Who Kill (11 p.m., A&E): Catherine and Thomas investigate a murder victim’s past.

Archer (11 p.m., FX): Archer, Ray and Cyril raft down a crocodile-filled river.

Teen Wolf (11 p.m., MTV): Kira faces an unexpected enemy.