Movie review: ‘The To Do List’ just lumbers, with little laughs
Published: July 27, 2013 01:49PM
Updated: July 25, 2013 10:02PM
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This film publicity image released by CBS Films shows Aubrey Plaza portraying Brandy Klark in a scene from "The To Do List." (AP Photo/CBS Films, Sam Urdank)

Watching the teen romp “The To Do List” feels much like that less-than-ideal first time having sex — awkward, sometimes painful and only fun for a split second.

Brandy (“Parks & Recreation’s” Aubrey Plaza) is a straitlaced, straight-A high-school virgin in 1993 Boise who decides to make a to-do list of every sex act imaginable as preparation to bed the hottest guy at the public pool where she works.

What starts out as a promising gender reversal on ’80s teen comedies — imagine the ones with John Cusack — eventually turns into an overly raunchy “Porky’s” for a modern generation. Even the most progressive moviegoers will wince with disapproval at Brandy’s casual sexcapades, and the laughs quickly begin to subside as we wallow in a clumsy, voyeuristic journey with Brandy getting her rocks off.

For some reason, first-time feature writer/director Maggie Carey didn’t get to the most important item on her to-do list: “Make a funny movie.”

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‘The To Do List’

Opens today at theaters everywhere; rated R for pervasive strong crude and sexual content including graphic dialogue, drug and alcohol use, and language — all involving teens; 104 minutes.