Well, when all is said and done, no Elvis Presley song will be axed from the Herriman High School play to satisfy the self-appointed censors in our pretty, great state.
I have learned the offensive song among the 23 Elvis Presley tunes that will be performed in “All Shook Up” is “A Little Less Conversation.”
And to make everyone happy, one line of the song is being changed, with permission from the copyright holders.
Instead of the lyrics: “Baby, satisfy me, baby, satisfy me,” the student actor will sing: “Baby, hold me, baby, hold me.”
And, other than minor tweaks in the wording throughout the play, the only major deletion in dialogue is in Act 2. The line that will be removed is, “Let’s go down to the swimming hole and slap each other’s privates.”
I also can guarantee there will be no morning glories displayed on the stage.
So the show will go on Feb. 27 through March 2.
There. Now doesn’t everybody feel better?
What comes around …? • Over the years Utah has received its fair share of federal disaster aid, especially back in the 1980s with flooding that destroyed, among other things, an entire Utah County town.
Since then, though, there have been mudslides, more floods, dam breaks and fires. When those disasters occur, our state leaders are not shy about asking for help. And the feds have helped us out.
Even some of our most stalwart conservatives in the Legislature have received disaster relief from the feds for damage to their farms and ranches.
Just since Gov. Gary Herbert has been in office, four major disaster declarations have triggered nearly $11 million in federal aid. That doesn’t count the drought relief Utah has received.
So all those Utahns who have been helped in their time of need ought to remind Utah Sens. Orrin Hatch and Mike Lee that it is appropriate for the entire country to help communities that have been devastated by Mother Nature.
Hatch has even taken credit over the years for the federal compensation fund set up to help affected Utahns who lived downwind of the nuclear tests in Nevada.
You might recall the outrage from elected officials in New York and New Jersey, including that conservative icon New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, when the House refused to vote on a $60 billion federal aid package for victims of Hurricane Sandy. The Senate voted in favor of the aid, but Hatch and Lee, in that Dec. 28 vote, opposed it.
The follow-up vote Friday for about $9 billion in aid was unanimous in the Senate. So Hatch and Lee are off the hook in that one. And give all four Utah representatives — Republicans Jason Chaffetz, Rob Bishop and Chris Stewart and Democrat Jim Matheson — credit for their yes votes in Friday’s $9 billion aid package.
But the initial “no” votes by Hatch and Lee might be remembered the next time Utah suffers from nature’s fury.
Every penny counts • When David Havas died in September, his brothers Edward and Max went through the process of winding down his law practice and closing his office.
Among the many frustrations was the telephone service suddenly being shut off after a misdirected payment and then having to pay a $20 re-connection fee.
When all the confusion dissipated, CenturyLink apologized for any hassle and refunded the $20, Edward Havas said.
CenturyLink even went further in its accommodations. Several months after the office’s closure, the brothers received a check from CenturyLink for an apparent overpayment of which they were unaware.
The check was for 58 cents.
You’re busted • Earl Arnoldson has wondered for years which neighbors were allowing their dogs to relieve themselves on his lawn during the cover of night, forcing him to clean up after them several times a week.
But he was up early recently and watched a man with a white hat passing by with his dog at 6:30 a.m. Arnoldson watched the dog do his business on his parking strip, then merrily walk off with his owner, who turned into a home he recognized on 8th Avenue.
Wondering if it was just an aberration, Arnoldson was peering out his window at the same time the next day and sure enough, his parking strip became the victim of Fido’s urges once again.