At 6 a.m., though, all of my professional interests were focused on finding a bathroom. It didn't help that the causeway out to the island smelled like an outhouse. The Great Salt Lake is not easy on the nose.

The situation became dire when I reached the island. No bathrooms were visible. The buffalo would have to wait. In the dark and rain, I parked near a collection of boulders and got out to take care of business.

I was almost among the boulders when they suddenly grew legs and got up. Buffalo. I ran back to the safety of the truck. On the bright side, I no longer needed to go.

Antelope Island is home to one of the largest bison herds in the world. The roundup -or "push" as it's called - is done by horseback and vehicle. Volunteers gather at the south end of the island and gradually move the herd toward corrals to the north. The buffalo don't like this much. In fact, there isn't much a buffalo does like. And really high on their list of major annoyances are people.

I made it to the ranch in time for the briefing. I don't remember any of it other than the part where we were told not to get too close because it wasn't unheard of for buffalo to poke a horn in somebody just for the hell of it.

That was all I needed to hear. I spent the roundup in the largest state truck I could find. A pair of 10x power binoculars was close enough.

A buffalo should not be mistaken for a badly groomed cow. The difference between a cow and a buffalo is the difference between Aunt Bea and Mike Tyson. Buffalo are cows that have formed a gang.

Buffalo have a mind of their own. They're also large enough to do whatever they feel like and make it stick.

Fortunately, buffalo are big on personal space. When the riders got too close, the buffalo got up and wandered north. Eventually, there were several hundred plodding toward the corrals through the rain and wind.

When it became clear that no one would get gored, I attempted to satisfy a historical question: would buffalo poop actually burn?

Weird as it sounds, early pioneers reportedly used buffalo 'chips' as a fuel while crossing the plain. I had brought along a cigarette lighter to find out.

For the record, rain sodden buffalo dung only smolders. It's also one of the few things that actually smells worse that the Great Salt Lake.

rkirby@sltrib.com