Robert Hilder's personal story is one that should have resonated with the Utah Senate.

Born in Australia, Hilder grew up in an alcoholic family, was sent at age 11 to a Catholic school where he worked the fields in exchange for his board, later became an underground miner and joined the LDS Church. After serving a church mission, he emigrated to the United States, received a scholarship from the University of Utah, became a lawyer and then a judge.

"I always wanted more," Hilder told a senate committee earlier this month.

But Hilder's hopes for advancement were dashed Wednesday when the Senate refused to confirm him to the Utah Court of Appeals following opposition from the gun lobby and publicly aired questions about Hilder's private life. The process has left many in Utah's legal community wondering whether judicial independence could be threatened by a new brand of partisan politics.

Hilder said Friday that the most difficult part was "listening to a debate about a person that was a caricature of the person I am."

He heard Sen. Michael Waddoups, a member of the Senate's Judicial Confirmation Committee, accuse him on the Senate floor of having an unbridled temper. A committee member had earlier made public references to unfounded rumors about his divorce.

"I did become angry, not seriously so . . . when asked in closed session [of the Confirmation Committee] questions impugning my integrity and misstating facts," Hilder said Friday.

How did Hilder react? "I challenged the question and probably turned red," he said.

Hilder, who was also accused on the Senate floor by Waddoups of breaking a number of ethics rules, said he had "absolutely never broken any." The judge has never been disciplined by the Judicial Conduct Commission and Waddoups cited no specific incidents.

Hilder said he believes such questions and accusations were a smokescreen to obscure the real issue: He was targeted as an enemy of the gun lobby following a high-profile ruling allowing the University of Utah to enforce a weapons ban on campus.

"Those questions were totally pretextual," Hilder said. "No one's ever told me what it was about, but [guns] were a very big part of it."

Many in the state's legal community felt lawmakers missed a chance to elevate one of the most skilled, respected and experienced jurists in Utah.

"It's a very strange way to compliment somebody on reaching the pinnacle of success in their career," said Gov. Jon Huntsman Jr., who nominated Hilder. "I would hope that it doesn't represent a new era of politics in the confirmation process."

Utah Supreme Court Chief Justice Christine Durham said she "would hope that everyone would want, and that candidates could expect, a fair process based solely on their qualifications for the position. Above all, my concern as chief justice is decisional independence."

Bert Brandenburg, executive director of Justice at Stake, a non-partisan national partnership of more than 50 organizations working to keep courts fair and impartial, put it more bluntly: "Based on media reports, [Hilder's fate] smells a little like political assassination."

Daniel Medwed, an associate professor at the University of Utah's law school, said Hilder's process leads him to be concerned good candidates might not apply for the bench in the future for fear they would be "dragged through the mud."

Utah Supreme Court Justice Ronald Nehring called aspects of Hilder's hearing "disgraceful," "totally offensive" and "preposterous."

Committee member Lyle Hillyard, R-Logan, had speculated about the nature of Hilder's divorce and made a public reference to "male menopause." Waddoups claimed Hilder has "a temper he has not learned to control" although attorneys in an anonymous survey gave Hilder high marks for demeanor, as well as 13 other catagories.

Said Nehring: "Were I Judge Hilder, I would consider filing a judicial conduct complaint on myself, as a put-up-or-shut-up move. You said I did these things, it appears you made it all up because you can't point to anything that supports it, so if you've got a case take it to the place where these things are properly adjudicated."

Nehring, who said he was cordially grilled during his own confirmation hearings about signing an order banning guns in state courthouses, said he didn't take at "face value" the senators who went on record to explain their vote.

Senate confirmation committee member Mike Dmitrich, D-Price, said the personal questions asked of Hilder were not "fair," but he never saw the judge lose his temper. Neither did Dmitrich see any support for allegations that Hilder violated judicial rules.

"The more I thought about this deal, I think the mind-set was made up that Sen. Waddoups had a problem with it, he's the new [Senate] president, and his followers were going to follow his lead."

Senators voted 16-12 against Hilder after the confirmation committee passed him by a vote of 3-2.

Medwed said lawmakers should scrutinize nominees, but questioning should be confined to fitness in terms of legal ability, demeanor on the bench and professionalism in court. But Gregory Bell, R-Fruit Heights, chairman of the confirmation committee and a Hilder supporter, claimed it was "absolutely fair" to judge a candidate on their demeanor while before the committee.

"Its not exactly a mirror of how that candidate acts on the bench," Bell said. "But how he or she responds to the committee could be a real index of character."

Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, had said on the Senate floor he was impressed by the outpouring of e-mails from "citizens," most of whom were anti-Hilder. Dmitrich said he did not receive a single anti-Hilder e-mail from anyone but gun lobbyists.

Many of the e-mails were form letters claiming Hilder's 2003 U. ruling was a demonstration of his "overwhelming hostility toward the constitutionally protected right of legal self-defense." And, as "proof of his bias in favor of judicial activism," the e-mails note that while a member of the judicial council in 2003 Hilder "voted to disobey" legislation to place gun lockers in courthouses for the convenience of concealed weapons carriers.

"We want judges who are not afraid to make unpopular decisions," said Medwed. "Those with the most experience will have most extensive record to be scrutinized. It's an ironic twist."

Currently, only two of the seven judges on the Court of Appeals have served as trial judges.

Following the vote that defeated Hilder, Waddoups noted that the e-mail input was "the only chance for the public to weigh in." He said the gun issue wasn't a deal-breaker for him.

"I was committed that if that was the only issue, I'd have voted for him," Waddoups said.

Senate President John Valentine said following the vote on the Senate floor that he had never seen "such an odd convergence of opposition and support" for a candidate in his 20 years in the Legislature. Curtis Bramble. R-Provo, noted, "There is a lot of angst in a lot of quarters, [and that] is sufficient for us to take pause."

Hilder said he hopes other judges will still apply for appellate court positions.

"I hope many do, I hope they are treated fairly," he said.

Long-term, Hilder said, "the biggest problem is the pressure it puts on judges to constantly be looking at the shifting winds of public opinion."

shunt@sltrib.com

-- Tribune reporters Robert Gehrke and Thomas Burr contributed to this story