Everybody Wants to Be Italian

» Opens today at area theaters; rated R for some sexual references; 105 minutes.

If you thought the ethnic stereotyping in "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" was bad, this charmless romantic comedy will drive you to despair. Directed and written by Salt Lake City native Jason Todd Ipson (who is, by his admission, not Italian), it follows Jake Bianski (played by Jay Jablonski), a fishmonger of Polish extraction living in Boston's Little Italy who still obsesses - and, frankly, stalks - his ex, Isabella (Marisa Petroro), even though she's married with three kids. His Italian co-workers try to set Jake up with Marisa (Cerina Vincent), a gorgeous veterinarian who they think is Italian. Whatever humor or warmth Ipson tries to squeeze from this situation dries up because Jake is such a creepy and unlikable character, and because Jablonski is as appealing as unrefrigerated trout. Not even cameos by proven funny people, Penny Marshall and the great Richard Libertini, can rescue this humorless production.

Kicking It

» Opens today at the Tower Theatre; not rated, but probably PG-13 for language and descriptions of drug use; in English, Spanish, Russian, Afghan and other languages, with subtitles; 99 minutes.

Most documentaries about homelessness don't have a lot of smiling, which is where this uplifting film (which played the 2008 Sundance Film Festival, and debuts on ESPN2 on Tuesday) is different. Director-writer Susan Koch follows the exploits of six homeless men - one each from Ireland, Russia, Kenya, Afghanistan, Spain and the United States - as they compete in the 2006 Homeless World Cup in Cape Town, South Africa. The movie deftly intercuts game footage from the tournament with profiles of the men as they battle poverty, drug addiction, war, abandonment and social taboos. The end product is more inspirational than any sports movie, because the impact of a simple game on the confidence and self-worth of these battered men is all real.

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