Explain the costs of negativity.
It sabotages productivity, morale, teamwork and performance. The Gallup organization estimates that it costs the economy $250 billion to $300 billion a year. It also impacts our health, happiness and longevity. Negative emotions are associated with increased risk of stroke and heart attack.
How can people turn a complaint into a solution?
Every complaint represents an opportunity to turn something into a positive. A complaint helps us determine what we don't like, don't have or don't want, then we can identify one or two possible solutions and take action. I suggest people write their complaints on a piece of paper on the left side. On the right side, write down a solution and/or action.
Describe no-complaining tools.
Add the word "but" after your complaint and then add something positive. You might say "I don't like driving to work but I'm thankful I have a job and that I can drive." Another tool is to change "have to" to "get to." Instead of saying "I have to pick up the kids" you say "I get to pick up the kids." It's about get to. I get to live this life. I get to serve customers. "I get to" is important because so many people don't get to do anything anymore because of illness and death. My mom died at 59 of cancer. I think about that often.
How does this play out in personal relationships?
I have had a number of people tell me they not only gave the book to a co-worker but to their spouse and family. Many families are doing the No Complaining Rule at home. Too often we focus on working hard to make enough money for a nice house, cars, kids' college and material things, but this creates a meaningless life and an unhappy marriage if you forget what matters most. The key is to nurture the relationship or else there is no spirit or life to your marriage. Take time for a date night each week. Make time for each other. Focus on the spirit of your relationship.
-Dawn House
